Oh, American Idol. I can’t even bring myself to write about you on a weekly basis anymore on my Idol-centric blog. You’ve always been terrible, just god-awful, in fact, but there used to be some pleasure derived from watching you. TWO HOURS EVERY WEDNESDAY. Are you kidding me? You’ve eliminated any sort of minor pleasure I get from the show–Ok, well mainly the pleasure was derived from laughing at the batshit crazy fans salivating at whatever WGWG or not-really-closeted-but-closeted-for-the-show guy was on that season. But that’s barely fun anymore and as I actually ENJOY BBC’s new-fangled Sherlock, I don’t want to get caught up in the fact so many sex-starved women are watching this shit and making terrible, terrible things. And those of you who aren’t watching Sherlock are diddling yourselves while reading some horrific Twilight fan fiction that is somehow a words-on-paper (No way in hell I’m referring to it as LITERARY) phenomenon.
HAVE THE FANTARDS WON? Chew on that and maybe I will as well, but that’s another post for another day…back on topic.
Clearly, no one likes Idol anymore and its not just the continuously sagging ratings offering up the evidence. NO ONE in the music industry wants to give rights to their songs to be performed on this shit show. Tonight’s Top 3 song spoilers features Joshua Ledet,
Jessica Sanchez Clove, and Phil Phillips singing TIRED renditions of everything we’ve heard every time before — Judges’ and Producers’ picks my ass, you guys just have a piss-poor catalog. Shockingly, no I Can’t Make You Love Me BUT we do have the most-overdone song in the history of Idol on the list, a song so overdone on this shit show I can no longer derive pleasure from it in its original form, granted was really only because of my deep, shameful, and unwavering love of the film in which the song was borne.
How can you even look yourself in the mirror, American Idol? You’ve never been good but damn, just when I think you’ve truly hit rock bottom, you manage to find (old) ways to hit new lows.