American Idol Top 11 do Elton John & TopIdol has a few ideas

This week’s American Idol will allegedly have the contestants singing some of Elton John’s greatest hits. For a show that aims to be hip, fresh, young, and relevant, they’re sure doing a bang-up job this year. We haven’t heard anything recorded since 2000 since the semifinals. The semifinals. Feels like ages ago, doesn’t it?

At first I was not excited, although Elton John does have some great songs not including Hold Me Closer Tony Danza, which is really only good if you’ve been drinking, or you’re in the mood for Tiny Dancer, which isn’t all the time. Then I realized this show could be a beautiful, entirely memorable explosion of all that’s right in the world if one of the contestants chooses to do Rocketman BUT they must open it a la William Shatner.

Rocket Man / I’m Still Standing
Casey Abrams

Casey Abrams is the ideal choice to do such a thing, but I can also see James Durbin or Pauly Whites McDonald choosing the 1972 classic. But Rocketman is perfect for Casey, who can infuse humor into it by doing a full Shatner opener — please start on a stool and in a tux. PLEASE. This will also give him the chance to slow roll his growl and show the judges he has a wider range than previously shown. This song is also pretty much about getting high and I’m pretty sure Casey likes getting high so its a win-win for everyone.

Of course, for a guy who keeps getting weekly blood transfusions and was saved by the judges last week, I’m Still Standing might be the perfect choice.

James Durbin — Have you ever heard Me First and the Gimme Gimmes? I adore them. No one takes a classic tune and punks it up as well as this five-man cover outfit from Southern California. If James takes on Rocket Man a la Gimme Gimmes, he’ll likely be called a genius by Randy, La Lopez, and that curious man with the Cache wardrobe.

Can You Feel The Love Tonight / Candle In The Wind
Pia Toscano

Something tells me Pia won’t take the judges advice this week and will stick with a stale old ballad. Can You Feel The Love Tonight is a horrible, horrible song. It’s mid-90s Elton John. This means it is perfect for Miss Pia Toscano.

Of course, she could also go with Candle In The Wind, a song people might not like but no one really hates. In an ideal Idol world, Karen Rodriguez would still be here to do Candle In The Wind and offer it up as a dedication to Selena, peppering it up with some Spanish lyrics, of course.

Scotty McCreery — Upon thinking about it, its not difficult to imagine Aiken E. Newman’s slow country drawl on Candle In The Wind. It wouldn’t be very difficult to spin this famed ballad with a bit of twang.

Don’t Let The Sun Go Down on Me / The Bitch Is Back
Jacob Lusk

In a perfect world, the fabulously flamboyant Lusky Stank would be doing The Bitch Is Back. Somehow, I can’t imagine Idol producers allowing that one on the air as this is a FAMILY SHOW. (Would they even allow someone who may obviously be a Friend of Dorothy to even sing Goodbye Yellow Brick Road?) Count on Jacob to take on Don’t Let The Sun Go Down On Me with his patented melisma, vibrato, gusto, elan, and all that jazz. Its actually a pretty perfect song to showcase all of Lusky Stank’s range and vocal flourishes.

Mama Can’t Buy You Love
Paul McDonald

Pauly Whites goes for somewhat obscure choices (at least where Idol is concerned) and its not difficult to see him taking on this very-70s (1979) number 1 hit. Its almost disco, but you can easily see McDonald attempting to do something interesting with it.

Lauren Alaina — This would only be funny since we’ve been treated to so many shots of Lauren’s wannabe sister mother Kristi in the audience. It would also require proper use of irony and self-awareness when it comes down to it.

Pinball Wizard / Your Song
James Durbin

Chances are, Durbin will select this classic from The Who’s Tommy. Its a hard rock classic, which as Randy would say, is right in James’ wheelhouse. It also allows for ample screeching and other i’m-edgy bravado.

Of course, I have a feeling songs permitted will only be from the JOHN-TAUPIN songbook so this Pete Townsend classic is probably gonna be a no-go. Perhaps James will slow it down a bit this week and have a moment with Your Song. Just as others need to quit the ballad crap, it might be time James show another side of himself and Your Song would provide the perfect opportunity.

Stefano Langone — But don’t count out Stefano Langone. Your Song is exactly is type of tune, and while it likely won’t make him a contender, he can make all the googly eyes and breathless whispers he wants.

I Don’t Wanna Go On With You Like That / Border Song
Naima Adeapo

Imagine what Naima could do with this little ditty about breaking up. I bet there will be dancing. I bet it could be really fun. But she could also get political with 1970s Border Song, it won’t win her any Tea Party votes but I’ll likely dig it. (Not that my opinion counts for much of anything.)

Paul McDonald — Could definitely also see him taking on this one. Also with dancing. It could also be very fun.

Honky Cat
Lauren Alaina

Since Sunday School Strumpet only seems to really know songs in the key of twang and likens herself to be some sort of sex kitten, Honky Cat seems like a safe bet. Prepare for that tacky leopard print ensemble typically seen on a 43-year-old suburban divorcee. Prepare for the shimming, the shaking, and even some claw hands.

Haley Reinhart — Also a perfect choice for Haley Reinhart. She, too, loves a’ shimmying and a’ shaking. It also looks more age appropriate on Haley, and you just know she’s been wanting to meow.

Pia Toscano — if Pia were to actually heed some of the judges’ advice, why not do a complete 180 and go with this catchy, up-tempo ditty? If Pia wants to stick around for awhile, she needs to stop being so concerned with the technique and start taking risks, because at this point, I would rather watch paint dry than another one of her performances.

Saturday Night’s Alright For Fighting / Circle of Life
Thia Megia

A girl can dream, can’t she? Come on, Thia Megia. Let your bitch flag FLY! You let loose a little bit with last week’s Heat Wave, but now let’s see the FIRE.

Oh who the hell am I kidding. $5 says she takes on that other terrible song from Disney’s The Lion King — Circle of Life.

Tiny Dancer
Stefano Langone

While I imagine this will be part of the Thursday Results Show Sing-a-Long-from-Hell Medley, its hard to imagine Stefano NOT choosing arguably the most this generation’s most recognizable Elton John song (Thanks a lot, Cameron Crowe). Unless he gets Your Song, of course.

Naima Adeapo — I want African drums and a tutu. And rapping. Got it? Good.

I Guess That’s Why They Call It The Blues
Scotty McCreery

While this song is an obvious choice for at least 7 of the contestants, perhaps it should go to Aiken E. Newman. He can put a country spin on it and see if it works. Connecting with the song’s more mature subject matter might be difficult for the teenager, but this does not seem to have hindered him whatsoever in the competition up to this point.

Casey Abrams — Well. The guy loves singing the blues, so…

Haley Reinhart
Sad Songs (Say So Much)

Haley has a great voice…if she sings the right song. While her days on American Idol are likely numbered, it would still be pretty great to see her knock one out of the park. She should listen to previous comparisons to Amy Winehouse and Adele and use this as a jumping point for that whole finding-herself-as-an-artist journey. Haley should work with Jimmy Iovine on a (real) contemporary arrangement, a little alt, a little jazzy. It’s the perfect opportunity for Miss Reinhart to up her game without upping her hemline.