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Taylor Hicks + Kate Gosselin = Instant Reality TV Show

2010 March 18
tags:
by TopIdol

I was on my way out the door when I saw MJ Tweet about a former Idol wanting to date Kate Gosselin.

Thanks, MJ! I was already running late! This morning, Popeater casually mentioned American Idol Season 5 winner Taylor Hicks expressed a desire to date uber-wombed shrill bitch reality whore Kate Gosselin. Hmmm…in a way its not entirely…wrong? Both are two of the most polarizing figures in the history of this endless crapfest called reality television. Both look older than their actual age. Both have well-recognized hair.

Which ‘Idol’ Winner Wants to Date Kate Gosselin?

… None other than the Soul Patrol himself, Mr. Taylor Hicks, would told me straight-up he’d love to get his chance to woo the original octomom.

Taylor and I were having drinks the other night in New York City (you’ve got to love a dude who still drinks Bud in a champagne-sipping crowd) when the topic of Kate Gosselin came up.

“I would totally date her,” Taylor told me. “I have always said I wanted nine kids, so it would be perfect!”

Taylor is currently breaking theater box office records around the country starring in ‘Grease’ and doing the one thing that all the other Idols seem to have forgotten about — performing live.

“People see Kelly Clarkson on the covers of magazines talking about her weight and Carrie Underwood always making headlines about who she’s dating and wonder where has Taylor been,” a friend of Hicks tells me. “Yet he’s happy to be under the radar doing what he always dreamed of doing — performing live eight times a week to sold out crowds.”

Spread the word. Do it.
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from → American Idol

  • deez

    OT again (I’m the worst for OT posts , I think) You may have all see this, but if not….Kris with TMI: http://mjsbigblog.com/kris-allen-tmi-in-witchita.htm/comment-page-1#comments

    LOL.

    • wino

      where is Lauren??? surely this will make her day :)

    • Mary

      TI must make this a post now!
      i love it :)

      • margie

        Lauren will pee in her pants with glee!! :)

    • Lauren

      :D DDDDDDDDD I am now convinced that Adam watches Kris when he goes to the bathroom. xD

  • Mimi

    Sorry TI, I don’t want to hijack this thread but I’m not sure where else to post these… 2 more reasons Kris Allen is effing awesome…

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SV-ByEXrdfI&feature=player_embedded

    http://twitpic.com/19j1to

    • deez

      Great mind, Mimi?

      • deez

        Ugh ^^^minds

        • Mimi

          Haha, yes! I don’t know if you seen the youtube link I posted with the twitpic but it’s Kris discussing the Glambulge… lol!

          • deez

            I just watched it (thanks!!) That was pretty funny.

            (kinda tired of the stupid reporters trying to get a negative reaction out of him by saying things about Adam…there’s no reason for it. Especially almost a year later!)

            That’s TMZ!

    • Burgundy LaRue

      For blacklisted–

      Someone replied to Kris: “Yours is bigger, but Cale’s is electric.” Ha!

      It was about their guitars of course, but let’s go to the gutter with this, shall we?

      • deez

        The Glamberts are foaming. Jedweber @ VFTW dug up this gem:

        There is no doubt re: the uproar if Adam had done the same.

        So kris shows himself peeing in the men’s room and it’s cute but Adam wears a codpiece and he has ruined his career?. the things that guy can get away with! …kris can probably kill a million puppies at this point and people will think it’s cute. …

        Kris is not interesting.. so why do we care????????????????????

        Adam is fascinating,unique so he will garner all types of comments

        Kris can pee from the top of the Empire state building in NYC ,wearing a dress with a fox collar ,and who would give a damn ,he would still be bland.. moving on to Adam…

        HAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

        • deez

          Wait….I though our friend from PF assured us that OLFIP was never, ever in eleventymillion years EVER discussed @ PF?

          (this must be more shenanigans from those wily Kristards!)

        • Nich

          Oh boy, lol.

        • Burgundy LaRue

          Kris pees cuteness. Adam just wets himself.

        • wino

          “Kris is not interesting.. so why do we care????????????????????

          best part of the rant. it really kills these tards when kris does something funny/cute/cool. i love it.

          i would fking pay to watch sparklecows on payperview react to kris stories. its so irrational, its almost beautiful to observe.

          • margie

            Kris has an obsession with peeing. This is too funny. Seriously, Glamberts are upset about this. Why? It’s funny as hell and didn’t Adam tweet back?

          • Nich

            I do love how often they have to say he’s bland and uninteresting and not worthy of talking about as they spent hours talking about how bland and uninteresting and not worthy of being talked about he is.

          • saskin

            Are the glamberts really upset? Link please? I love it when they’re upset.

            I don’t think this picture is in bad taste. Normally it would be but I think because they are dressed in black and white and the urinals are white it is almost a B/W photo but the guitars are in color so they grab all the attention away from the fact that they are peeing. It is interesting. Why do I feel there is a Beatles photo like this?

          • margie

            Nich that’s the funniest part..they track everything he does

      • blacklisted

        Cale is so beautiful…even from behind. And now we know he’s a lefty!

        • Blue Eyes

          The Glamberts are clearly jealous that Kris is clever enough to post a funny picture that got funny attention.

          • deez

            They don’t get that type of humor. Everything for a Glambert needs to be obvious. Sarcasm, irony, parody ….anything like that…. is like WTF? to a Glambert. They need a big glittery pie in the face. (and follow that up with seltzer down the pants, just in case).

            Glambert humor=Gallagher. They would think Steven Wright was a boring dude who didn’t speak loudly enough.

          • http://topidolblog.com TopIdol

            My good friend Melina (of On The Meaning of Adam Lambert Dramatic Reading fame) once saw Gallagher live in college (The real one. Not the brother). And he pissed off the entire audience and started slinging racial slurs. Gallagher sucks.

            And Timmy would have come back had he not died. So sad. Loved that little guy. I also find it amusing I make a Taylor Hicks post and it diverges into soap opera talk.

  • blacklisted

    Slightly OT, but since I despise Kate and all the idiots like her (e.g. Duggar 3000 and counting), I wanted to mention a rumor re: Brian Frons head of ABC Daytime tv. Well, everyone knows that Frons systematically destroyed the soap opera landscape on two networks (CBS and ABC). His newest plan is to get OLTL cancelled. Rumor has it that he’s fired the head writer for OLTL but doesn’t want to announce it until after the Emmy’s b/c he doesn’t want the writer to win by getting sympathy votes.

    Anyway, he’s all up Kate’s grille and is in plans to create a daytime talk show for her. That’s why he finagled his way into getting her a spot on DWTS. Seems this is the first step to getting her an audience at ABC. He intends on getting OLTL cancelled so that they’ll only be room for his two costly babies (AMC and GH) and he’s getting Kate a daytime talk show I guess to take OLTL’s place. He thinks Kate will attract the frauen. Anyway, sorry for the OT but I despise this bitch and I despise that piece of shit cum rag, Frons, therefore rumors of two evils combining should be mentioned.

    • jukejoint

      I’d believe it. I think he came in with his reality TV resume just to kill the soaps. He is one seriously crazy son of a bitch, and he turned GH (the one he messed with the most when he first got there) into a misogynistic, unwatchable mess, totally screwed over AMC, and he’s been doing his best to just dig a hole and throw OLTL (the only ABC soap with anything at all to recommend it) in while nobody notices.

      So, yeah, I’d believe it.

      I still think Taylor Hicks is gay, though. So any reality show for him and the Gosselin freak would be a put-up job and just an excuse for Taylor to get his mug on TV.

      • blacklisted

        Frons hates women. That makes him the perfect man to run ABC Daytime….to the ground.

    • http://topidolblog.com TopIdol

      Daytime TV is the worst shit known to man. I can’t stomach any of it whenever I’ve been home and turned it on.

      Kate Gosselin sucks. All those people with the litters suck. TLC sucks.

      • wino

        what???? Marlena being possesed by the devil on Days of Our Lives was the bomb back in the day :) and dont get me started on Timmy from Passions. My favorite little man of all time.

        • http://topidolblog.com TopIdol

          TIMMY TIMMY TIMMY

          Let’s make MARTIMMIS!

          • http://facebook.com/atxjenn jennwin

            Sorry for the double posts but pputredictive text sucks ass. Bu
            t I think you get my drift lol.

    • Paulie

      US Daytime soaps are not aired from where I am but OLTL did catch my attention because of the “Kish” storyline (LOL — and Youtube videos are presh). But then apparently there are being written off (boo!) so I guess I have let ‘em go. Sadz.

      • Paulie

        *they are being written off. EDIT!

    • erinnthered

      From some insiders…well, former insiders…OLTL has been on the rocks for a while. They got rid of some of the best writers a couple of years ago, and they’ve been decimating slowly ever since.

      FYI, if you want the old OLTL watch DOOL. A bunch of people landed there. Word is it’s gotten better.

      I’m not a big daytime soap person, but I watched a couple as a kid, and now I know a soap writer.

      • blacklisted

        Daytime has been destroyed by the money men who recycle shit head writers. They hate originality or an old skool take of daytime involving core families and scenes lasting more than 60 seconds (seriously, what the heck is up with all the quick cuts. No Emmy worthy performance can come from that).

        I don’t watch but every once in a while I’ll follow a story on utube.

        What Frons and others have done is sad to me b/c I was an ABC Daytime kid raised on all these soaps. In fact, one of my earliest memories involve my babysitter and I sitting on her couch eating a snack while watching a woman get on stand and scream, “Haven’t you heard what you want…that I’m a COMMON HOOKER like Katrina Carr!!!..What do you want from me Mr. Callison? My blood?! More slime?” One of my earliest childhood memories along with Luke date raping Laura which I think happened around the same time frame b/c my memory is of my babysitter crying next to me while watching both those stories.

        *sigh* Alas, the days of daytime greatness is behind us. I won’t watch GH b/c they despise women. The only thing that will get me to watch OLTL is if they bring back the real Todd and have him wipe the floor which all the idiots in Llanview who trusted an obvious fake. Since he’s Todd, I wouldn’t want him to end up with any woman. Real Todd knew that he was too broken to ever have a woman by his side. Sadly, soaps have regressed 50 years in their view of women thus an anti-hero getting what he’s sowed will never happen.

        • Mithra

          I grew up watching Days of Our Lives on and off because everyone n my family seemed to watch it and when we were at the family summer house taking a lunch break from the lake we’d watch it. Some of my early memories too, but I never got into the relationship storylines. Boring. I liked the crazy shit like Stefano and demon possesion and all that :D Also loved Passions when I discovered my grandmother watching it with a friend. I was like “what the hell are you watching Yia Ya, and are you smoking crack?” I take it this is NOT what you guys like about soaps :D

          • Mithra

            Oh yeah, and the messageboards are hilarious. I followed the coffeerooms ones and Dustin’s for a while. The fights were vicious

          • jukejoint

            Idoltards ain’t got nuthin on crazy-ass soap fans. In fact, I think Idol may be the new soap since the old soaps are dying. They just can’t live without vicious fighting on the internet about something. Since nobody cares whether Adam goes with Erica or Brooke anymore, it’s all about whether Adam is kissing that ho dressed like an Indian Chief or the other ho who plays in his band.

            I started watching soaps in junior high and I used to take sick days just to catch up on All My Children. In college, my roommate loved Ryan’s Hope and OLTL, so I started watching those, too, and then in law school we all watched ten minutes of each of the ABC soaps between classes in the TV lounge across from our classrooms. Those were Luke and Laura days. None of it was ever serious, although I did suffer withdrawal when my husband and I went to Europe for two months after I took the bar exam and I missed what happened to L&L when they stowed away on a boat and ended up on an island and stopped the villain who was going to freeze the world. How could anybody take any of that seriously? In law school, we enjoyed making fun of the characters and the scripts because they were so easy to make fun of. Still kind of appalled anybody DOES take it seriously. Kind of like American Idol contestants and fans.

          • wino

            haha, i just declared my love for days and passions in a comment above. soaps were enjoyable back in the day, or at least thats how i remember them as a teenager.

            and yeah, for those wondering who did the soul patrol loonies and sparkle cows fight over prior to Idol…soap stars! im telling yall, these bytches write fan letters and stalk actors as a sport.

          • Burgundy LaRue

            I still follow The Young & The Restless. It used to be great–these days, not so much. The best memory I have of the show is when Jack walked over Victor after Victor had cussed out Jack, then had a heart attack. Jack thinks about calling 911 for his mortal enemy, but decides not to and LEAVES VICTOR THERE FOR HOURS. Jack eventually got help, but man that was cold-blooded, even for a soap opera.

            Roger Thorpe and Stefano DiMera were two of the best villians ever on TV. Stefano is still around, thankfully. The actor who played Thorpe died years ago. :-(

          • blacklisted

            Mithra, Days and Passions were babies of James Reilly master of camp and cracktastic storylines. His stuff purposely was unrealistic. OLTL and AMC were babies of Agnes Nixon who was mistress of relationships (familiar, friendship, romance), commentary on social issues and push toward diversity in soap characters. Fans of more ‘realistic’ stuff that veered toward controversial in terms of hitting social issues (e.g. abortion, gay teens, black heroes and heroines) were into her stuff. Folks that loved the camp, over the top and unreal loved Reilly. Nowadays we don’t have either.

          • http://topidolblog.com TopIdol

            OMG. I occasionally watched Passions because of TIMMY. And then he died. Sads. Timmy was the best soap opera character ever.

          • Mithra

            Timmy died the day his character dies, although they said they would bring him back later I think. So sad. Timmy was awesome.

          • Mithra

            Reilly, aka JERK, the most hated man in DOOL fantardom. He’s like the Sanjaya nemesis to soaptards. I LOVE HIM!!!ELEVENTY!11!!! The boards are SO similar to the scaryboards. “I’m NEVER watching again!!!” I haven’t watched for two years, SOMETHING MUST BE DONE!!!” etc, all by morons who post 50 times a day. Absolutely hilarious.

            I take issue with your comment that JERK wasn’t into diversity like Dixon. Did SHE have little people like the beloved Timmy, orangutan nurses, witches, lesbian axe murders, portal to hell in the basement, SATAN? I think not…

            Here’s my Hero Goddess Sami Brady with Kate as the Thanksgiving turkey:

            http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=b249N9-0ivQ

            The Passions Tsunami:

            http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GdRY6awcF4Q&feature=related :D

            The guy who plays/ed John Black was atually attacked along with his family by a deranged fan. They showed up at his house when he was doing some repairs or something. They thought he was possessed by the devil and attacked his wife and maybe his daughter? in the backyard. He and his son grabbed the nut and tied them up with duct tape until the police arrived.

          • http://topidolblog.com TopIdol

            I loved Kate. Loved her. And I have a REAL LIFE friend named John Black. He is often asked how Doc is doing.

          • http://facebook.com/atxjenn jennwin

            OMG. I know this post is so old but it

            had me cracking up. I LOVED Passions. I was on Cofferooms and even had my own site Fate. I was a huge Theresa and Ethan fan. Yes you can shoot me now. I wrote a lot of fan fiction til I got plagiarized and realized the show sucked ass. That was my fantarch lesson anda that’s why I take none of this shit seriously lol.

  • deez
    • erinnthered

      Oh Em Gee!!eleven!!1!!

      That looks like tard art!

  • Blue Eyes

    Most of his frauen could care less about his music. He could be singing Ring Around The Rosie and they would still say how great he is. His frauen are your typical Idol frauen fanbase…they oogle him, saying how sexy and handsome he is and pretty much only want to fuck him. It’s the truth.

    • erinnthered

      Blue Eyes, I’ve had a lot of experience with Taylor’s frauen up close. It’s a scary, and devoted, bunch. Just trust me.

      All of the frauen have a particular thing that sets them off. A style that attracts them. They don’t just switch styles. The ones that do aren’t frauen, they’re just mentally ill and need a new person to be co-dependent about every year.

      Most of Taylor’s frauen like the blues rock aesthetic, Adam’s like to feel “safe” (aka gay men) – hence the Clay crossover, David Cook’s like the guitar rock aesthetic. They fall for the next contestant to fill that void. That’s why a lot of Claymates took so long to move on.

      Maybe Michael Johns siphoned off some Taylor fans, and maybe something about David Cook took some others, but there wasn’t a real contender for their love until Casey.

      Adam definitely didn’t get many old Taylor fans. Any doubts I had about that disappeared at Fantasy Springs.

      • Blue Eyes

        OK, I trust you. Truth is I’ve never been around these people, but I have read their forums and they go on and on about how sexy and handsome he is, which leads me to believe they are not that interested in the music. I doubt these people have been around music that much because if they think that’s good, then these people have no taste in music, whatsoever.

        • erinnthered

          The crazy thing about Taylor frauen is that he attracted more of the types that had been music fans in the past. People who got to see Stevie Ray Vaughn in tiny clubs, and met Buddy Guy back in the day. They hadn’t listened to anything new in a couple of decades until Taylor. It’s that whole sexual re-awakening, as opposed to late first awakening. They are totally in to his looks too, but like any woman, they have a “type.”

          Believe me, I got burned by some people I thought were friends I’d developed from that group. When a bunch of us who really were just interested in the music criticized his first post-Idol album there was a lot of trouble and heartbreak. The music fans moved on, and the frauen were all that was left.

          For the record, I was never attracted to Taylor, and those of us who weren’t were the first to get burned. By him, and by his frauen.

          That’s what I mean when I say that a lot of the musically inclined Adam fans will move on when they get over his looks. It remains to be seen if they’ll continue watching Idol. A lot of the former Soul Patrollers didn’t go back.

          • Blue Eyes

            erinnthered, I can totally relate to you. I liked Taylor on Idol and even bought his cd. But, when I spoke up in one of the forums and said I didn’t like his cd, I was bashed by the crazies. I even went to one of his shows, since he came to my hometown. He’s a good performer and the show was OK, but the women in the audience were middle-age housewifes and grandmas. Almost all of them were overweight, old and dressed very badly. It was really the most uncoolest audience I had ever seen. After that experience, I quickly lost interest in him. I don’t have any interest in lame Broadway musicals he’s now doing. I didn’t last long enough to make friends with any of his fans..thank God, because most of them are insane.

  • erinnthered

    Taylor does love his blondes! lol

    No, Taylor’s frauen would never be in to Danny, Adam, or Kris. I think the last contestant that appealed to his frauen was Sunshine. No, I’m not kidding.

    Maybe Casey and Crystal this year. His frauen love the blues.

  • soapbox0916

    I am pretty sure I heard him say he has a crush on Kate a while back.

  • Blue Eyes

    Poor Taylor! Most of his frauen left him for Danny Gokey/Adam Lambert/Kris Allen. So now, he only has about 10 frauen left, who are the real nutters of the fanbase. Looks like desperation time to me. He will now do or say anything to get any kind of attention. Sad part is, it’s not really helping him at all.

  • jukejoint

    Performing live eight nights a week to sold-out crowds? Really, Taylor? Unless I’ve misread accounts of these shows, he gets one song. And he’s in a fairly small touring company of one of the lamest pieces of musical theater around, right down there with Lil Abner and Starmites.

  • http://drlulzington.wordpress.com/ Doctor Lulzington

    Of course he’s happy under the radar. He’s hiding out from his frau legion. The frauen must also be why he finds Kate Gosselin attractive. Everything’s relative.