I guess this is better than last week? AI9 Top 20 (Girls)
After much drama and rumors of a possible disqualification, right before showtime, it was announced Crystal Bowersox (love her) would perform on tonight’s American Idol.
Because its so unlike American Idol to drag something out. While I would rather see Crystal Bowersox singing on life support than oh, say, 80% of this season’s contestants do anything, I still think Idol took this will she or won’t she game just a wee bit too far over the last 24 hours.
Jesus christ. Bitch better stop this shit. Only Paula can glome onto Simon! I’m THIS CLOSE to calling Kara DioGuardi something that starts with C and rhymes with something you should not to in baseball. THIS CLOSE, DAMMIT. THIS CLOSE.
Crystal Bowersox
As Long As I Can See Light
Crystal is going first! Even though she was hospitalized. She has a twin brother. Brothersox! She said he’s a square. I love you, Crystal Bowersox. Tonight, she’s putting a gospel spin on the Credence Clearwater Revival classic. For someone who was an infirm yesterday, she certainly sounds good. She even makes good use of those pesky backup singers!
Is Crystal missing a tooth? At first, I suspected they made up this whole hospital story in order to give her proper recovery from some crazy dental makeover (see Joanie’s visit to the dentist in ANTM Cycle 6). The plot thickens. Or not. Maybe she lost that tooth a long time ago and anyway, who cares? Crystal Bowersox is awesome.
I wonder if I will sleep better tonight knowing Randy finds truth in reality. He’s a modern-day Nietzsche. Kara DioGuardi proves, once again, why Shit-For-Brains is a more suitable monkier. The bitch said Crystal sang You Oughta Know last week. Uh, no. She sand Hand in My Pocket. Simon busts out the Bush-ism misunderestimate. Dude. But he finishes by comparing her to Kelly Clarkson.
(I feel kind of strange that I stopped the DVR midway through the commercial break in order to see Kris Allen’s Ford commercial. But they’re just so damn endearing and sort of make me want to buy a Ford for a few seconds. If I buy a Ford, will I be awesome in one just like Kris Allen?
Haeley Vaughn
The Climb
Haeley thinks we could not tell she made her headbands all by herself. Homegirl please. Haeley is singing Miley Cyrus, therefore, she is likely to at least be superior to the original. The Climb is a terrible song. Haeley is woefully out of tune. And she said she was going to try and not smile, but its obviously impossible for her, so she should just go with it, I guess.
Yes, the performance was youthful, but dude…it was a bit cringe-worthy. I am almost inclined to agree with Randy when he says excruciating. He doesn’t think she has a connection with the song. No. She does not. Because she was smiling. It’s all about climbing shit, and climbing shit is tough. She really should have worked on squinting a bit more, as to appear she was gritting her teeth.
Lacey Brown
Kiss Me
Lacey likes screwing around with old furniture She does a better job at it than I could, so I’ll give her a couple of points for her little hobby. Sadly, she took Kara DioGuardi’s advice from last week and is now doing Sixpence None The Richer’s Kiss Me (you knew they were a Christian group, right?). If someone is going to sing Kiss Me, they really need to come out in a little red dress or overalls a la Rachel Leigh Cook in She’s All That. Frankly, Kiss Me is a lame song to sing, as it is fairly karaoke. It’s just like in Karaoke Revolution! It so is!
I really like her voice. Or I think I could, but this song, ugh. The arrangement leaves a lot to be desired. The most entertaining part may have been watching Big Mike [Lynche] dancing to it from behind. Oh. And I really would love to know how to duplicate Lacey’s dewy flushed cheeks. Lacey smiles a lot during the song, but it seems more appropriate than her predecessor because the song was about kissing and not climbing.
Is anyone else starting to get angry at Ellen? I sort of just want her to be mean to someone! BE MEAN, ELLEN. BE MEAN! Oh, and in case you were wondering — I don’t see Lacey lasting beyond the Top 16.
(Luke Wilson. What’s up? I’m glad I got to have a few drinks before you arrived this evening. Giggity, giggity. Now lose the blazer.)
Katie Stevens
Put Your Records On
Katie Stevens may look all sweet and innocent, but she doesn’t fool me. She’s a mean girl camoflaged in Aerie clothing. And color me unconvinced she had nothing to do with Miss Bowersox’s recent hospitalization. You know she was pulling some Nomi Malone shit. She also wants us to like her because she can say give me a kiss in six languages…including English. So its not all that impressive.
Megan Joy sang Put Your Records On last year, and I don’t care what any of you haters say. I loved Megan Joy. She was also a better dancer than Katie Stevens. Katie bounces from the knees! That is so not good for her joints. People in the audience look confused, as they’re not sure how to clap. Sure, Katie has a decent voice. Does it blow me away? No. Will we ever see her do anything but sing the song as it was originally recorded? Hell no. We didn’t see David Archuleta do that, either. (And I swear, if I am forced to hear this kid sing Angel, I will cut someone.)
Ellen repeats the mantra about Katie not singing to her age. Well golly gee. Haeley Vaughn did The Climb? What else could she do that was more her age? I tune Shit-for-Brains out because she often makes me want to fling myself out my window. Or fling poo.
Shoot me now. In searching for young artists Katie might like (under 20), Seacrest suggests THE MOPPET OF BEELZEBUB/IMP OF HADES. Yo, Ryan. What is your obsession with that douchebag eunuch?
Didi Benami
Lean On Me
Before Didi hits the stage, she prays. And meows. Oskar is not amused. Didi bugs me. She also is too stupid to know what indulgent means. When I hear she is doing Bill Withers, I got really scared. I thought, no…no…when I said I missed Season 8, I didn’t want you people just to sing songs I heard back then. If Paisley Meow Bitch was gonna sing some Ain’t No Sunshine, I might have been tempted to throw down. Too soon, ya know. (And yes…I already know what Lilly Allen is singing…but I don’t recall that one being rearranged.)
Didi isn’t the worst thing I’ve ever heard, but the song goes NOWHERE. It’s stuck in song purgatory. I think she jumped around on stage. I’ve already forgotten it, except for the dude playing double bass. And while Ellen is the designated nice judge, who can pull random songs/artists out of her ass on occasion, she needs to stop being nice. She has rendered herself completely useless. At least Paula would tell someone they looked nice when they sucked. She actually humors them by commending them on their vocals. I’m almost appreciative of Randy stepping up his game, as no one gives a rat’s ass what Kara has to say, because that bitch just wants to hear herself talk. She also meows. Oh Kara, you are such a c….c…..cu….cougar. Plus, if I said it, I would be disrespecting Scottish slang and every Irvine Welsh book I’ve ever read.
Seacrest wants to caress Didi all night long. And call her his little Bieber.
Michelle Delamor
With Arms Wide Open
Michelle doing a Creed song? That’s almost interesting! This might be the first time Creed has ever been interesting.We all know the only time Creed was a tiny bit cool, and that was for about 60 seconds during the Paul Walker-Joshua Jackson (living in my dream harem alongside Jon Hamm) classic, The Skulls.
Sadly, I could not find the clip I was looking for, you know, the one with Paul and Joshie riding in the speedboat to Skull Island, however, I did find something truly disturbing. And its Idol-related! It’s Clay Aiken!
Michelle directs a little kids’ church choir, therefore, she prays before performing. I think David Cook is the closest thing to an Atheist Idol we’re ever gonna get. I guess it was interesting. Er, more interesting than last week. To be honest, I ended up watching half of the Joshua Jackson tribute video while marveling at just how terrible an artist Clay Aiken is.
Yes, Ellen. We get it. You love almost everyone’s song choices. When Shit-For-Brains starts talking, I want to start punching things. Sure, she’s nice to Michelle. That’s great. It’s her favorite performance to date because it was believable. Yada yada yada. Shut up you stupid, c….c….condescending twat.
Vera Wang is here?
(Giggity…giggity…Luke Wilson. He lost the blazer.)
Lilly Scott
A Change is Gonna Come
Glamberts must be shitting bricks right not, as Lilly is singing Sam Cooke! The same song their savior sang for last year’s finale. Personally, I’m excited to hear a girl [other than CORETTA SCOTT MERCADO] do it. I adore Lilly. She doesn’t pray before she goes out on stage. She uses throat spray. Pragmatism is so much cooler than relying on Jesus.
Could someone tell me why Lilly Scott is even on American Idol? How did she slip through the cracks? This is phenomenal. It’s like an entirely new song. THIS is how you change it up. THIS is how you make something old entirely new again. Gee whiz, this reminds me of when…don’t shoot me, ok? But when Kris Allen sang Ain’t No Sunshine. I’m not discounting Adam Lambert’s finale performance, but I preferred this one because it was a bit more restrained. It was a different take on something sung many times before. Of course, as with most things, nothing compares to the original.
Shut up, Kara. You just suck. She says Lilly just had a moment and that cool people are now going to try out for Idol now, just because they’ve seen Lilly Scott. Simon doesn’t want to love Lilly, so he takes her down a notch, clearly saying he prefers the Bowersox over the Scott. I dunno…I thought Crystal was great, but tonight, Lilly blew EVERYONE out of the water. (And she was wearing a kick ass dress.)
Katelyn Epperly
The Scientist
Katelyn has studied a bit of recording engineering. Good. She has a tiny clue. Last week, Katelyn was a pleasant surprise, leading me to believe I could really end up enjoying her this season. She’s also quite personable in her pre-performance package. Katelyn will also be the first contestant in the semifinals to play the piano, and while Coldplay can sometimes prove disastrous…
Katelyn’s The Scientist starts off strong, not unlike Lady Gaga’s stripped down Poker Face, perhaps? And her voice…it’s not entirely unlike…wow. Once again, I am happily surprised by Katelyn Epperly. She also gets bonus points for something very special. I spy a BABY QUATTO THE MOLE on her head. This can only mean she is blessed.
Did Ellen prepare her notes ahead of time? Guitar? Or was that a joke. So now she chooses to criticize? Too slow? While ballads do put me to sleep on Idol, I thought this was one of the strongest performances of the night.
Paige Miles
Walk Away
Nice SmartWater plug. Sometimes, I like to color, too. No, really. I do.
Paige is not a bad singer, she’s just not…memorable? Again, I do hate it when people do songs by Past Idols on the show. This is also one of Kelly Clarkson’s weakest songs. Its a serviceable rendition, however. Paige has a strong voice. Not so sure about the glory note, nor am I sure she knows who she is as an artist. Perhaps you should show me a coloring book.
No wonder its one of Kelly Clarkson’s weak songs. Kara DioGuardi helped write it! BTW, can I start calling Paige Lisa Turtle now? She totally has a Lark Voorhees vibe about her. Speaking of Kara, she ruins everything. It seems she wrote this about some guy that done her wrong, therefore it should have been ANGRY. ANGRY. I don’t want to know these things about her. Funny, I never thought Kelly Clarkson sounded angry when singing it, either. Kara DioGuardi, you are such a c—.
Siobhan Magnus
Think
Ah, yes. Closing the show with quirky little Siobhan, whose endearing awkwardness and killer fashion sense makes me warm to her a little more each week. She also once had a mohawk. She could be the closest thing Idol has ever had to Lisbeth Salander.
Siobhan shows some serious balls to take on Aretha Franklin’s Think. And this little white girl from Cape Cod is pretty damn good. And holy shit. That glory note. Combined with the fact I adore the faces she makes while singing, well…Siobhan Magnus, I think I kind of love you. I’m even more taken by this week’s performance in comparison to last week’s Wicked Game. One minute, she’s low register. The next minute, she’s going off the charts. Siobhan Magnus is worth watching. Because now I’m wondering what she’s gonna do next.
So who is gonna be sent packing this week? Smart money may be on Lacey and Didi, although I suspect Haeley, Michelle or Katie may also be in danger. Hmmm…what about Paige? Maybe it would be easier if I just said who is NOT going home:
- Lilly Scott
- Crystal Bowersox
- Siobhan Magnus
- Katelyn Epperly (Baby Quatto, I love you.)
But I still kind of miss Season 8, don’t you?
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La Princesa led the way for more authentic females this year. I still remember her awesome rendition of Poppa was a Rolling Stone, gave me chills. So DioGuardi is mistaken, as usual, ’cause some girls are already bringing it on. I loved Crystal and Lilly. Kathelyn was ok, following Quatto Sr.’s footsteps (he too went with Coldplay last year remember?) Siobhan and Natalie Portman were separated at birth. Katie needs to go away.
Shit, where’d my other comment go? Oh well.
Basically.
You miss Season 8?! I’ve been missing Season 7 ever since I heard Nigel left. Oh, Nigel. This show is utter and complete shit without you.
Though I can’t complain after seeing QUEEN. DEAR GOD I LOVE YOU SO MUCH. QUEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEN. And Santana.
Oh and can you PLEEEEEEASE investigate Katie Stevens? Interview anyone from her high school, SOMETHING. I HAVE to know that she’s a bitch. HAVE TO.
Season 8?! I fraking miss Season 7!
Though I do miss the days when Adam Lambert wasn’t a BRAT DIVA SEXUAL DEVIANT. Well, at least to the public. I think those traits are what came out of the closet, since he was so obviously gay.
The stupid episodes are FINALLY loading. Channel 131 didn’t have the Zshare downloads this week so I have to let them load without volume. -_- Poop.
I like how On Camera Audiences chooses THIS season to constantly e-mail me tickets until I say yes… though I guess I do want to see Simon before he flies the coop. =(
I’m digging Lilly and Siobhan.
I have little for or against Bowersox. She’s a good singer. But also nothing new.
OT…..but BAH!!!! Humbug:
http://www.adamlambertsecondtonone.com/?page_id=2
I bet everyone in Arkansas is surprised to learn they were whipped into a statewide religious frenzy to stamp out the gay. hahahahahahaha!!!!!!
Adam will be horrified if he hears about this book. Kris is his friend, and he loves him. He’s happy with the result. IDK why she had to do this. Hope it tanks.
I sincerely hope she is arrogant enough to send him a copy, and he sends it back with a note that reads “Get a life you crazy bitch.”
I also hope she’s on the hook for thousands of copies of this baby, and gets her pants sued off . You have to work lots of “cheffing” hours to pay the self-publisher, when you can’t depend on the lawlering.
I’m sure he would do something like that.He’s snarky, and the fact that someone actually took the time and effort to create a document that tears down the show that made him, as well as one of his best friends, would royally piss him off, and that is putting it mildly, I believe. From the get go he asked his fans to stop hating on Kris, and really on other Idols in general. But some just won’t listen. As much as I wanted him to win, if he is ok with the result, I am ok with it too. This is crazy. I can’t believe she did it. And I bet she will send him a copy. She has already been promoting it on his OFFICIAL FAN SITE for months. It is clear he and his management disapprove, because she also keeps getting banned for it.
See, here’s the problem. There are two big typos in her promo piece that she apparently didn’t catch before she put it up. Plus she confused “legitimacy” with “literacy” and contradicts herself on the issue of whether homophobia was the lynchpin of Kris’s victory. AND she apparently wants us to think that she’s spent 7 hours a day on this since last May. By my count, she had no more than 284 days (last May 20 through Mar 1, and that’s being generous, since she’s claimed to be done for awhile). If “thousands of hours” equals at least 2000, then she spent at 7 hours each and every one of those 284 days researching this book. Seriously?
And those are the errors JUST IN THE BLURB. Imagine what the whole book is like! How can you take someone seriously when she is clearly careless, illogical and untruthful?
You know, you might be right. We both wrote about the same thing
“How can you take someone seriously when she is clearly careless, illogical and untruthful?”
well, i would say NO, but then again look at Sarah Palin’s large following LOL
Scary, but true.
What the Hell is Toad Suck Queens? I have been to Toad Suck Daze but are these Beauty Pageant Queens?
Margie, they’re just like Sweet Potato Queens! Have you read Jill Conner Browne’s books? I think the “Toad Suck Queens” are the SPQ Chapter in that part of Arkansas.
Oh ok…thanks On the Edge
Arkansans thought that Kris Allen win will bring the state “cultural literacy”??? Bummer. If Adam won he would bring them “universal congruity” which has a bigger range and better falsetto than “cultural literacy”. Stupid.
If Bill Clinton couldn’t even bring them cultural literacy…
I doubt that 10 Kris Allens can provide Arkansas with more cultural currency than Johnny Cash. Seriously. You can’t tell me that people in AR have forgotten about him already.
Oh, sweet Jesus, will somebody get this fearless “independent investigator” a good copy editor already? Let’s help her out, shall we?
I’m sure I missed some, but I refuse to read this a second time.
And who drew that ridiculous picture on the cover? It doesn’t even LOOK like Adam.
Haha, I didn’t even seen the “cultural literacy” one! This woman never even graduated from high school, let alone law school.
I can promise we weren’t forced/brainwashed/ordered to vote for Kris. JFC I didn’t even know there was a contestant from AR on AI til I started watching Top 7 week.
I haven’t been in Arkansas since I was 8 and I still voted for Kris! The horror!
I am really convinced now that this book will be hilarious. I hope enough of it gets posted online to enjoy. If the errors in logic are as obvious as the ones in grammar and spelling in this promo, we may be laughing for days.
I’m sorry, Kerry, but Kris Allen is not convincing at all as an icon for any crusade to stamp out homosexuality.
And this is completely OT, but if I’m going to have to look at all those photos of “Kradison” (just shoot me for even typing that word), I want a photo of David Cook up there. If you can go all Kristard with no fall-out, I intend to wear my Cooktard badge proudly. Use something from that Morongo gig (see below), will you? We want to encourage him to Just Say No to the combover.
http://3888.voxcdn.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/02/david-cook-youandi.jpg
See, that’s what I said too! It’s not ALL about Season Eight, you know…
I asked about David’s hair last week, but never heard a response….His hair looks way less tragic in that photo…is it a new thing? Much better! I’m a Kristard as well, but Cook was my season 7 fav (even though I haven’t kept up with him lately).
Yes it’s a new cut for Cook and I think it looks great. The comb over makes his hair look even thinner than it is. Definitely check out the Morongo videos and photos.
Agreed, it does look great…will check out the videos!
I must be suffering from some unknown neurological condition that affects my auditory processing, but I actually preferred last week’s peformances of this group. I thought Crystal was really good last night, not great, but given all she’s been through, I give her a solid A.
I love what Lilly and Siobahn each attempted, but I was reeling from the execution of both. I think they maybe just needed more time to hone what they were doing, but I didn’t get the tongue baths they both received (although that may have been pre-planned because of fears that Crystal won’t be able to last the season). Still, I’d give them each B+s because they’re cool, and I like what they do, and they’re NOT BORING.
I thought Katelyn was really good, too, goddammit,so I’d also give her a B+.
Paige was okay, I guess, but she’s just so inherently dull (and I kinda like to color myself, although I hate people who outline the figures so they don’t color outside the lines — what else do you do, put plastic slip covers on your sofa?). And that song is complete crap to begin with, which makes perfect sense when you realize Kara wrote it. I’d give Paige a C. Solid mediocrity.
As for the rest, they SUCKED. Ds and Fs — spread them around as you will. I actually like Lacey (keep making that furniture — I’ll buy a piece!), but she’s bad, whereas Haeley is BAD (in the Paul Fussell way), so she might be worth keeping around just for the LULZ. And I *loathe* Katie after sitting through her little video package.
For the first time EVER, I actually dozed off during American Idol. That’s saying something. (Not sure what exactly, but it is.)
Paul Fussell’s book Class is a must read.
Katie needs to go away. She is so transparent and clueless. She’s more annoying than Kara. It figures in her narcissistic pea brain she’d think it’s so posh to learn a bunch of phrases in other languages, and those phrases of course revolve around her ego.
I hope Kara tries even harder with Simon, to the point that he just blows.
I suppose it would be really pedantic of me to note that she didn’t pronounce any of them properly, either. Well, except English.
CLASS is one of my favorite books EVER (even if it forced me to accept the fact that I will forever be a low-prole in spite of my degree from a top-tier school.
Fussell is an uber-curmudgeon. LOVE him. TI, you need a copy of CLASS if you haven’t read it. (Follow the link below and be sure to “look inside.”)
http://www.amazon.com/Class-Through-American-Status-System/dp/0671792253/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&s=books&qid=1267726691&sr=8-1
TI! I think you were reading all my thoughts when you wrote this blog
Lilly Scott definately had the best performance of the night with Mamasox coming into a close second. I thought her performance was just as good as Adam’s last year, maybe even a little bit better.
Katelyn surprised me the most. With Soibhan getting the pimp spot this early, K is definately now the dark horse of this competition. But I didn’t really like her version of the Scientist but thats only because I love that song and people should just sing it just like it is. But her vocals were one of the best of the night.
Soibhan’s glory note. DAMNNN!! Thats all I can say.
And the rest can suck it! But since 2 more have to enter the top 12 I would go with Michelle (if she doesn’t pick anymore Creed songs) and Didi (hey, shes better than the rest of them)
Katie Stevens scares me, much in the way the ‘cool’ girls back in school scared me. Like I l knew I was about to get picked on. Not liking it at all. And smug on Idol is a HUGE turn off for me. Confidence is good, but be humble and grateful for the amazing opportunity you have been given. Plus she destroyed ‘Feelin’ Good’ (last week? can’t remember which week it was she sang it) which is now an Idol Cardinal Sin since Adam did such an impeccable job with it during Top 5 last season. Wish Haeley would do better. I can’t help but like her, so young and innocent, she kinda reminds me of Archie. I must grudgingly admit that Lilly did a good job with ‘A Change is Gonna Come.’ However, in my mind it is outrageously bold to sing any song that Adam Lambert ever uttered so much as a note of. Can’t help but flash back to his performance and compare, and I am quite sure I will almost always find that I love his version more. Bowersox was by far the best, and Siobahn is just awesome, too. Those are the only 2 I want to see stay. The ones I didn’t mention were simply too forgettable to bother with, and need to be killed off one by one as the weeks go by.
No one should ever sing a song Adam has sung before, including himself, because he’s just that good. If one of these little poseurs dare sing something off For Your Entertainment I’d literally HATE to see the reaction.
LOL nobody would try that! No way would anyone in their right mind touch FYE on the Idol stage. They don’t want to have to say hail marys for the rest of their lives, do they? I just think that people will forever compare you to Adam Lambert if you sing a song he sang, that’s all.
On the other hand how awesome would it be if they had an Idol losers theme week where contestants had to sing songs from all 8 runner-ups? Song choice is everything, it will show what kind of a loser they’re going to be.
I love that idea, Saskin! Idol Loser Week, have at it!
I would also like to note (regarding any song Adam ever did being off the table) that AJ Tabaldo did a heck of a job with “Feeling Good” and got eliminated for it, and he was adorable and a very good singer before one toe of Adam Lamburglar’s faux-rock boots ever hit the AI stage. I’m sure AJ (and Leslie Hunt, who also sang it that season, and was also eliminated for it) should’ve known that the Godbert was going to sing that song two years later and they shouldn’t attempt it because One Must Not Dare Touch a Godbert Song, Even Retroactively.
AI playbook: All contestants are equal, except some contestants are more equal than others.
IKR? Can you imagine Dewyzee singing a Blake Lewis song? Neither can I, but that would be good TV.
With luck nobody will ever sing FYE again anywhere. The song just blows.
Don’t worry, none of these people, even Haeley, would touch that musical smut with a 10-foot-Lilly’s-earring.
Musical smut? you MUST have a hearing problem. No need to hate on Adam. Sure, he isn’t everyone’s style, I have admitted that in numerous posts. HOWEVER, you cannot deny that he is one of the most memorable AI contestants ever. And he is FAR from a loser. Like TI said, they both won. nuff said.
This should change your mind. Spectacular display of Adam’s talent.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yKF-UXS8doQ
It was by far the best finale of any I’ve seen. Kris and Adam deserved to be the final two standing. And I still don’t think either cares which way it would have went down. The point of going on Idol is to get exposure and a record contract. Hell, I doubt anyone does it for the free Ford. They both won. Period.
@Top Idol, agreed! They both won. They both deserved to be the top 2. Will echo your sentiments one more time as I did above.
Yeah, I love the finale–it’s my all-time favorite. I’m talking about his album, which is a glittery turd.
i don’t get the same take on lilly allen’s performance last night… her voice, and the praise she received from the judges for it really let me know just how lost and desperate they are to find something, anything positive to say to these contestants.
her voice and delivery, though interesting, lacks the heft and emotional grit it takes to sell ”a change is gonna come”. she was not connected emotionally anywhere in that song, and that song almost requires it for it to be believable. adam lambert missed the mark in that aspect of singing it last year for me too. not saying it’s an ”untouchable”, but it is not a selection that every person labeled a singer is going to be able to sell. it is a song written during the height of the civil rights movement, a testament of hope, juxtaposed against the brutality, beatings, and other humiliations southern blacks suffered daily… sam cooke naturally left the blueprint in his original for the range, emotional connection and right amount of vocal ”grit” needed to pull it off. some have done well – kelly clarkson, jhud to name a few other females w/the chops… more thoughts later after catching up with the comments, and watching the performances on dvr…
how this song is supposed to be sung – always imitated, never been duplicated… the late, great sam cooke…
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=48K5Y0421Ig
So I am not the only one who did not believe Lambert’s “big emotional connection” to the song last season?
You’re one of two apparently.
Make it three!
Is that the one he ended in a completely different key than he started but no one noticed because everyone was terrified of him shouting at them?
I think they all need to take a trip Down the Rabbit Hole with Adam like the rest of us have. They will come out changed people.
nope, you werent ti, lol… he sang it ok, but i felt he seriously lacked the emotional connection the lyrics of this song almost demands… you don’t have to have the best or most powerful technically great voice to pull this song off… you do have to be able to go a little deeper with it than singing words and notes off a page, without understanding some of the context behind them… that’s primarily why allen’s version just left me cold… light, quirky, easy/breezy is not the approach to take for this song… same as katie last week with ”god bless the child”… the song demands more than just singing the words, and looking all pretty and petulant – billie holiday was not the best technical singer, but it was the emotional connection and her unique phrasing that made her so brilliant, and makes ”god bless the child” another song best left alone if you have problems conveying real emotion when singing… i’m sensitive to that quality when these contestant tackle standards on idol like these two… they will either point out your vocal skill and talent, or they will expose the critical flaws in your wheelhouse…
But who’s Allen? Do you mean Scott?
Yes. She means Lilly Scott.
Gotta say it, Katie didn’t sing “God Bless the Child,” that was John Park.
It may be a testimony to how forgettable this season is.
oh my goodness, yes – lilly scott. i need a scorecard to keep these people straight, lol.. sometimes they just all overlap in my brain.
i think it’s time for a nap, lol… how in the hell did i confuse john park with that young girl… too much brain bleach will do it every time.
It’s fine. Lilly Allen is pretty cool so its an understandable mistake.
Nope. I thought he was “acting” it rather than feeling it. Complete with facial expression of almost-crying.
He does act his songs. All of them from what I can see. But it’s BAD acting. Good actors have an emotional connection to their craft. He’s like a shitty soap actor, and not even a funny one like on Passions or Telemundo. He’s such a fail at campiness as well. He then tries to write it off as that when he’s mocked and called out.
Mithra – Agree about the camp fail. I was going to post an example, but I like it here.
Get this. He reminds me of Barry Manilow. Hahahaha. Is he still alive? Anyway, Manny was a semi-glittery, bombastic, predictable singer but, unlike Adam, he had great phrasing. He’d pull you into a song, it’s all good, then out of nowhere he’d shout “key change!” and keep on singing. I never figured out who he was talking to because he accompanied himself on piano, he used the same back-up singers for years and he sang the same crappy songs for decades. In retrospect, it’s pretty funny, but those WTF moments more or less ruined the rest of the song for the audience. My point is that whenever he did that, I knew he wasn’t feeling the lyrics; he was just going through the motions.
So when I notice Adam’s performance tics—the aimless wandering on stage, occasional odd phrasing, goofy “badass” facial expressions—they remind me he’s not living the lyrics; he’s faking it while he calculates his next move. I hope Adam finds a way to authentically connect with his audience because what he’s doing now isn’t working for me.
Catching up kinda late…
Kara is a cunt. Own it.
I agree with your top four. Loving Lily and Soibhan especially. I want more from Crystal, and I hope Katelyn gets a chance to develop.
Because I basically watched the guys and girls altogether, I’ll throw this in here…Where the hell did Alex Lambert come from? That was awesome! He’s only done a few live performances? I really hope he’s given the chance to develop, because he could very well be the Kris of this season. Or at least, the only guy with a good shot at the top 5. Lee has too many voice problems, and Michael is good but generic. Casey just comes across like the typical contestant to leave at 6th place.
I’m just hoping a lot of the indie people make the tour, because this may be the strangest AI tour yet. Could you imagine a top 10 where more than half of them couldn’t stand the Disneyesque crap they’ll try to ram down their throats? Who knows what kind of random artists we could see them cover.
I’m already dying to see some good disaffected pointy poses from this crowd. heh
Big Mike was the best part of 2 performance/packages tonight. The hairband in Haeley’s package and the scarf wearing dancer in Lacey’s song. I like him. I really dig Siobhan as well.Katie has to research “young” songs. That says it all. I’m a Kris tard so yeah I always watch his commercial. Didi doesn’t take being told she’s not perfect well does she. I think Lacey is toast. Haeley unless VFTW saves her. Didi maybe.
Lilly and Crystal were freaking awesome. I agree with TI, Lilly’s version of Change is Gonna Come is much better than Adam’s, because she didn’t scream at us.
Siobhan was close and now I’m wondering just how big her range/voice actually is. Maybe she’ll bust out some Christina Aguilera or something just to show off.
Katelyn, I don’t know what to say. Yeah, she can mostly sing, and The Scientist is a great song, but it came off as way too pageant-performance.
Didi, go away NOW. Voice is way too whiny for me.
Katie, go away NOW too. Am I the only one who noticed her trying to do the eye-f**k think?
Lacey, well, she can stay another week or two as far as I’m concerned, but I expect to be bored every time.
Paige, I don’t mind so much, she at least seems to like being there which is more than some of them.
Michelle, I almost forgot about her already.
Haeley … who knew that anyone could sing The Climb worse than Miley did?
I forgot to mention the most interesting thing about Michelle… she was wearing the other half of Adam Lambert’s gloves! So THAT’s where they went!
I was definitely wondering about her gloves, too. I’m a huge fan of fingerless gloves. I guess she was trying to economize when she chopped hers off. Or the finger gloves are now in style. Who knows.
“rhymes with something you should not to[sic] in baseball”
I think there are plenty of situations where doing this is called for, e.g., advancing a runner into scoring positions, especially, if the pitcher is batting(in NL) … unless you meant football, but even that is necessary.
AAAAH !!! ^^^^^Unsuspected baseball strategy….*starting to shake* need to watch baseball… pitch counts… opposite field hitting…suicide squeeze… the Wheel Play, *eye starting to twitch in anticipation*. (Oh baseball, my love.)
I thought the same thing, Betty Blue, and wondered if Kara was possibly a calk. I think I should add that to Urban Dictionary for her.
Calk: A noun used to describe completely stupid, egotistical, smarmy, useless, annoying, unwatchable female talking heads on television when they are at their most stupid, egotistical, smarmy, useless, annoying and unwatchable.
Ex: Did you American Idol last night? That Kara DioGuardi bitch is such a CALK.
Ex: Ann Coulter is the biggest calk ever. Why do they allow her on TV again?
Ex: Sarah Palin? I think she’s a calk. Why do you ask?
What rhymes with “adjusting your jock-strap on television”?
Wow. That was bad. Only girl who could sing a song semi-decently was Bowersox and there are tens of thousands of girls singing at coffee shops and metro stations who can do a better job than that.
It is so strange to me that they are forcing all the black girls (and boys) to sing black girl (boy) songs. I think, we all know that both Haeley and Paige can take a black girl song and sing the shit out of it but it will take them out of the competition. Those two have the best voices, Haeley a bit better but very very untrained and unreliable.
Both Katie from Connecticut and Katelyn with a cheating dad sound like they have been taking singing lessons since they were 7, they do everything a vocal teacher would like them to do, unfortunately they are not that good.
No matter what the girl with white hair sings I hear the same song, which is so totally weird.
Siobhan said she learned how to scream like that in the shower but I think she was lying. I think she learned it when she accidentally stepped on the tail of her cat. WTF?
That leaves us with the blond girl who almost cried, very skinny corporate singer girl who likes to pretend that she is singing and the red haired girl who is tone deaf. I wish they kicked all three of them out this week so we don’t have to listen to one of them again next week.
1. Crystal
2. Lilly
3. Siobhan
Past those three I don’t care who goes home this week or next. I don’t know anything about the technicalities of singing. The only way for me to judge a singer is how their songs make me feel. Those three girls actually made me feel their songs. The rest of them were forgettable or just plain awful.
I take that back. I want Katie Stevens to go home this week. She comes across as smug and bitchy. AI has had plenty of contestants that were smug. But some of them had the charm, talent and originality to back it up. She does not.
I don’t quite know what to make of Siobhan, to be honest. Her weirdness is kinda off-putting, but I’m not sure if she is aware of her weirdness, which makes it a little endearing. But that note she screeched towards the end? Yeah, uh, no.
Lilly is my favourite, although Simon is bent on putting her in the shadows of Crystal. I get that the thought of Mamasox going so soon and under horrible circumstances would have made the show even less palatable, but, I’m beginning to feel like Simon is about to anoint her The Chosen One, and I don’t like that. Also, I think Lilly seems to actually fit the description of the female contestant that I want to see on the show – plays instrument(s), has a knack for quirky arrangements, and has a sense of humour and self-deprecation.
The judges annoy me this season. Not just shit-for-brains, who is trying too hard to sound like a relevant expert, but all of them. Come to think of it, I’m not sure if any of them really count as relevant anymore outside of this show. Except for Ellen, who is the other way around. And as much as I dislike Katie Stevens’ singing and song choices, stop telling her to pick younger songs! She obviously isn’t into the Miley Cyrus and Disney starlet crap, so just let her sing whatever the hell she likes and just let the public send her packing!
Lacey and Haeley need to go first, though.
YES! We’re digging the same four chicks. They’re really the only ones with talent and promise for greater things, imo. The funny thing is, they’re all “dark horses”. I find it amusing, because I speculated on previous occasions that any one of them could be the type of girl they’re looking for: I’ve had a vibe from the get-go that they want some sort of fusion of a bluesy/jazzy/folky/indie rock chick. And, uh, well…just saying.
Of course, I’m kind of nervous for Lilly, after seeing DialIdol, which I know is stupid since last week, Siobhan and Katelyn were the bottom 2 girls listed. But then one or two people worried about her, one saying she wasn’t generating much fanbase love (I beg to differ everywhere else I look, but w/e) and another thinking she might go home tomorrow. (Say it ain’t so!) Ya think the sparkle cows were THAT butthurt? I think it would constitute as perhaps *the* biggest robbery in the history of AI?
But I hope the judges’ praise, Lilly’s awesome quotient, the 12-string (!) guitar, and the fact that she might be a female Kris/Cook song rearranger will counteract all. She, her Idol BFF Crystal, Siobhan, and Katelyn all deserve tour spots.
Anyway, enough fantardy paranoia. Onto the rankings:
First, last week’s, which I altered a bit after encored listening:
01) Lilly
02) Siobhan
03) Crystal
04) Katelyn
05) Didi
———————–
06) Michelle
07) Katie
08) Paige
09) Lacey
10) Janell
11) Haeley
12) Ashley
And now, this week’s:
01) Crystal
02) Lilly
03) Katelyn
04) Siobhan
————————
05) Paige
06) Katie
07) Didi
08) Haeley
09) Lacey
10) Michelle
I had Michelle at #9 earlier and Lacey at #10, but I can’t remember why I hated it more. Either way, any of the bottom six can GTFO, and I’ll sleep peacefully tonight. I’m kinda hoping it’s superficial-fan-favorite Didi, who is so generic and overrated, it’s insufferable. Yeah, “Terrified” was a good performance. OMG, Kara wrote something that doesn’t fill me with rage. (Although it probably would if I heard it emerging from Tits McPhee’s mouth.) Yes, you were kind of underrated last week and better than 5 of the others. So what? FYI: Admitting that you don’t know the definition of a frequently used term on this show is not as cute as Siobhan asking “What does that mean?” in a stoner voice, hun.
I do like her more than some others, but the tard meltdown over her expulsion would be epic. But I can’t imagine either Haeley or one of the divas going home this week (they’re both unmemorable). Thanks to the voice comments and performing in the penultimate pimp slot, Paige might survive. I can see her in the top 12, perhaps. But Michelle changing up the song might gain her points. Ugh, I dunno what to call. It’s easier to say Lacey and Haeley.
…Just like last week.
I enjoyed almost every performance last night (except for Haeley and Michelle). I think there are a lot of talented girls, so I’m not finding this season as boring as some people are. Totally agree with you TI on Katie and Didi. I like Didi’s tone, but she seems like she’s trying so hard to be cute and be liked, and when she was criticized after her perfomance it looked like lasers were going to shoot from her eyes. Major bitchface. So, the phoniness bugs me. I also find Siobhan really endearing. She’s so odd. I didn’t like that big, big note, but I found it so comical that I laughed. Then my husband said, “Wow, that sounded like a saxaphone!” which made me think of Sergio, and I laughed even harder. I guess my rankings for last night would be:
1. Lilly (Stunning performance, imo)
2. Crystal
3. Siobhan
4. Katie (ugh)
5. Katelyn
6. Paige
7. Didi
8. Lacey
9. Michelle
10. Haeley
i actually liked katie stevens’ interview package….i got a sense of sarcasm from her and im totally loving the mean girl vibe. mainly because i like the movie Mean Girls, with the awesome Rachel McAdams as one of the best mean girls of all time. her song choices and performance style is all over the place (aka lame). HOWEVER, she gets bonus points for giving Randy a WTF face when he suggested she copycats a singer of her liking who is under 20. sorry randy, not every teenager has to have a miley or taylor vibe. fk, it kinda annoys me that they harp on this shyt every year. they did it to allison last yr, and now again with katie. hmmmm, lilly is only two years older…should she also sing only songs by artists under 20??? what they need to tell katie is to stop dressing from the Charlotte Russe clearance rack and maybe then she can carry off “older” songs. she has a good voice, she just needs to put the pretty prettty bows down and embrace her inner byotch.
best of the night was Crystal…her voice, from start to finish was pretty close to perfection. i loved lilly, but thought the arrangement was a bit off here and there, and some of the high notes sounded strained. (still second best of the nite).
oh my gravy, michelle? wow. her notes were all over the place, a bit manic. i was extremely glad when the song was over.
and i still cannot warm up to lacey and her scrunched up/ renee zellweger sour face. ugh. go away please and take michelle and haeley with you. thanks
Anyone notice that “great” is Ellen’s favorite(and only) word to describe all the voices?
Kara’s pretty. That’s it. I really do cringe most times when she speaks. Could be just peer pressure from TI– I don’t know.
I agree with TI, Randy is using his words this season and I haven’t heard once, “for you for me.”
Simon is, well, Simon, unpredictable and awesome as usual.
For me for you- all, I only remember the ones that were interesting (for me). Starting with the best first. Siobhan and then Bowersox. All the rest can pack there bags for all I care. Buuut if I had to pic one more it would be Didi Benami cuz they made her cry (almost) . But I bet she broke down after the show. Girl couldn’t even speak! That’s just cruel…
Love the ford commercial with Kris –”The music is in the car you know, forever now.” He’s so friggin cute. Simon was right, he IS a Teddy Bear.
I can’t stand Katie Stevens. I LOATHE her, in fact. She has a smug Gokey quality that I find distasteful. I don’t buy the “innocent 17 year old” crap either. You’re right, TI, very “mean girl”. Megan Joy’s version of that song kicked Katie’s version’s ass. Now I want La Princesa to show up and kick her real ass, you know she could do it.
Speaking of ass-kicking… was it just me, or was Simon about to put his fist thru Kara’s teeth at several points tonight? I heard “under the breath” mumbling from him during her nonsense-spouting. He also seemed to recoil whenever she tried to cozy-up, plus he had a look on his face that screamed open hatred. Most of the night, he seemed to look the in opposite direction whenever she spoke. I was more entertained by the Simon -Kara dynamic than I was the singing. Bowersox/Lily=good, most everyone else… meh.
Ugh, just, no Haeley. Even Blair Waldorf knows headbands are on the way out.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eaFjeJ1kY_Q
Siobhan is a nice surprise. I was wowed by her.
Bowersox is better- thank god for that. Looking at her teeth, the gaps are on both sides apparently.
I know exactly what you mean about the Ford commercials. I keep finding myself hankering for a Ford with leaves on the dashboard. Will it come with a Kris Allen to ride shotgun and sing to me?
As for the performances… I did not enjoy that show as a whole. The middle of that show was just dire. I mean… If there was anything to have changed my channel to, I would’ve. So here are my rankings. (I’m hoping to get picked up by What Not to Sing as they go roaming around the internet looking for scores to pick up. Yoo hoo, WNTS!)
1. Crystal — It was very good, and she deserves the extra praise for coming out when she didn’t feel well and knocking it down. I didn’t get why Lilly was R, E and K’s choice for best o’ the night, but I think they forgot about Crystal since she went first. And why the hell did Crystal go first? She shoulda had the pimp position. A-
2. Lilly — Not crazy about her earrings, but I like almost everything else about her. It amazes me that she’s as young as she is. (19, I think?) I kind of wondered if we were gonna get the “busker” complaint from Simon. But then, I really need to stop expecting him to be in any way consistent. Liked her a lot. She was fresh and different and had the courage of her convictions to do it her way. Damn the torpedoes, full speed ahead for Lilly. A
3. Katelynn — I’m as surprised as anyone, but I really liked it. She turned Coldplay into something Alicia Keyesy. (I don’t know Natasha Bedingfield’s version but then, I hate her, so it’s not likely I’d care what she did with it, anyway.) I wasn’t at all sure what the morons on the panel would say, but I liked it. B+
4. Lacey — I like that song and I thought she did fine. It’s not really a tough thing to sing and it doesn’t require anything major, but she did what she needed to do. I appreciated that she didn’t make my ears hurt, like pretty much everybody below this level. C+
5. Paige — There were parts of that I liked, and parts (the woop woop stuff) I hated. I agreed with Ellen that it was clear she was enjoying herself and I appreciated that. Screw Kara for wanting her to be angry. She has no way of knowing Kara’s state of mind when she wrote it. C
6. Siobhan — It sounded way more screamy than good to me. I think she’s weird, and not in a good way. She’s fearless, I’ll give her that, but the scream that they all liked… It sounded like a scream and not like singing to me. I also thought that was the most whitebread performance of “Think” I’ve ever seen. I don’t think whitebread is what that song needs. C-
7. Michelle — Ugh. Creed (or Screed as we call them in my household) is bad enough, but the way she screeched through it… It was a nice outfit (as they all discussed) but she really sounded baaaad. I don’t know what Kara and Simon are smoking, but I thought she played to her weaknesses instead of her strengths. And it was CREED. Ugh. (Meanwhile, somewhere Katie is sticking pins in a Michelle voodoo doll, since Michelle was nowhere near the melody and still got good comments, unlike Katie.) C-
8. Katie — Fake, fake, fake. She and that song did not go together. It was like the lounge singer version of the song. I think she just sings old no matter what the song is. She looked cuter tonight, though. A little less GLEE and more Osmond. Which I guess is not necessarily a good thing. She shoulda come out and sung Archie’s “Crush.” I think that would’ve suited her fine and solved the problem Archie had his season, too. D+
9. Didi — Ugh. She sounded awful. Not as bad as Haeley, but it just sounded strained and way out of her depth. Last week’s song was a much better choice even though they didn’t like it, either. I am really, really wondering if the people they thought were going to be good (i.e., the pimped people like Janell and Ashley and now Didi) are just diving into the dumpster or if they were cannon fodder all along and I didn’t realize. But so far, the quirky group (Crystal, Lilly, Siobhan and Lacey) is schooling the ingenue group (Didi, Katie, Katelynn and Janell) and the ethnic group (Haeley, Paige, Michelle and Ashley). D
10. Haeley — OMG, that was unbearable. Just awful. Poor kid. She picked a terrible song and then made it even worse than the screechy mess it is when Miley Cyrus massacres it. This was like it was stabbed and then drawn and quartered and buried with salt plowed into the dirt on top of it. She seems like a sweet girl, but they never should’ve cast her when she doesn’t seem to have a clue how she sounds, and how she sounds is horrifying. Sorry, Saskin. I know you like her. But I find her really unwatchable and unlistenable to. F
I’d like to see Katie and Haeley go home, but I’m thinking it’ll be Didi and Michelle. I dunno, though. We’re due to lose a quirky girl and Lacey may be the one. I’d personally escort Siobhan from the room (just so studiously quirky that it kind of turns me off) but she seems to be the cat’s meow to a lot of other people, so I can’t imagine her leaving yet. We’ll see.
I haven’t voted yet, but I’m kind of tempted to send some votes to like, seven of them, just to deny the other three (Siobhan, Katie and Haeley) a few votes. Cause I pretty much don’t want to listen to those three ever again as long as I live.
Nope. I am not getting the Siobhan love. You know Ally Sheedy’s character in The Breakfast Club? Or some other weird girl, the one who sat behind you in some crappy required class in high school and then just out of the blue one day told you she made jewelry out of her ear wax and then giggled over the awesomeness of her ear wax necklace all the way through the teacher’s lecture on Benjamin Franklin? That girl is Siobhan Magnus.
I think I have that exact same gap in my teeth and I actually have a fake tooth there. Long story, but my last eye tooth would never come down. That is probably all I have in common with Mamasox because Mamasox is awesome. For all the jokes about making fun of her teeth, this is the first time I have payed attention, and looking only at this close-up pic, her teeth don’t seem any worse than my teeth overall. Yikes!
An old friend of mine will text me shit about her teeth during her performances. AND IT PISSES ME OFF.
Somebody I was watching the show with seriously wondered if she’d had those two teeth pulled as part of some “look” that would complement her pierced lip and dreads! I assured him that, given how yellow her teeth had been prior to making the Top 24, I seriously doubted it!
It’s okay, TI…if you can’t call Kara a cunt, I’ll do it for you. Kara is the cuntiest cunt that ever cunted. Sometimes, it just HAS to be said.
And I didn’t even watch tonight; I base this all on media coverage and last season…I watched “Man V. Food” and dreamed of how Adam Richman and I would make a great platonic couple. You know, touring the country in search of the best pizza or BBQ, working out together in the off-season when he’s not doing the eating thing, and lots of nice hugs. He’s not a “hottie” by any means but he’s cute and cuddly and funny.
Oh, and Kara’s STILL a cunt.
I’m really loving Siobhan- I almost don’t even care what she sounds like. She makes me smile!
And don’t feel bad TI, I always stop the DVR to watch those Ford commercials. Even though the last Ford I owned used to stall every time it came to a stop.