As we’ve read many times before, David Cook is no stranger to batshit crazy fans, however there is yet another special one who demands (or CRIES) for attention. Since that’s her goal, I figured I would help her out. Oh, and some of my favorite readers/Cook fans thought it would be a good idea, as they have legitimate concerns about Cook and his band’s safety.
Celineps1, as she is known throughout the Cook fandom, alleged having “MySpace sex” with Cook and then, his bandmate Neal Tiemann. There have been numerous tales of her stalking the band, possible police restrictions at a Virgina Beach show, oh, who knows. She likes to talk about all her ALLEGED encounters with Cook and Tiemann to whomever will listen. Naturally, Holly/Maryann Sockpuppets let her run wild amongst her many personalities at David Cook Uncensored for awhile. Who know what is true and what isn’t, as this nut courts attention and encourages people to believe whatever they want, even if its utterly preposterous. Basically, no matter which way you cut it, this woman is whacked.
Celineps1 would regularly harass Cook and his bandmates via MySpace, often posting sick shit. I believe she was blocked from their pages. Of course, she took her rambling shit show to Twitter. I have no idea how one person could devote so much time spamming and harassing people online, as well as writing lengthy accounts which are most likely in the realm of extreme fan fiction. In any case, Santa probably needs to bring homegirl a restraining order for Xmas.
Here is a transcript of her obsessive tweeting of Tiemann, Cook and Andy Skib which took place between Tuesday and Wednesday afternoons. This batshit craziness ensued after Tiemann posted this to his Twitter.
Uh oh…here it goes…
Celineps1 @nealfingtiemann La fin de l’affaire? LA won’t do. Flight over the pond? Let’s do this right. Let’s
Celineps1 @nealfingtiemann Ahh hells no baby! U chewd me the fuck out for callin ure druggy ass self out on myspace!
Celineps1 @nealfingtiemann n now u do it on twit cause your tweeked? Wtf my dude. Way to fuck em all hard!
Celineps1 @nealfingtiemann this is th real Fing “smokin” n u know I gotcha more than a dimebag baby
Celineps1 @nealfingtiemann u’re fav “brownies” r cumin outta the oven as we tweet so bring u’re happy ass over sweety
Celineps1 @nealfingtiemann So sorry babe that wuz mean of me. U know I worshipd him as much as I did U. Just bummd n tweeked ;(
Celineps1 @nealfingtiemann U know I’m serious abouut the bag n brownies right? Celebrate his life n fuck thinkin!
Celineps1 @nealfingtiemann so u have to b all phony to ure freak fans who think ure all kinds of brilliant n ask me to kindly
Celineps1 @nealfingtiemann shut the fuck up n put a cock in it! I luv the real dirty u n I know how u’re mourning
Celineps1 @nealfingtiemann n stop yellin at me to shut the fuck up cause u can’t b realz! Just cum back to me n u’ll feel better. Promise
Celineps1 @nealfingtiemann If the good ones die young then…b careful. Remembr when I saw that dalmation n cryd missin Bradley N.? Cause I luvd h …
Celineps1 @nealfingtiemann him too n u understood n I’m bein a bitch but u know y
Celineps1 @nealfingtiemann n I just want u to have the brownies n share em with that “friend” u said dug em
Celineps1 @nealfingtiemann n remember when we were beautiful
Celineps1 @nealfingtiemann cause that’s the end game
Celineps1 @nealfingtiemann freaks no I don’t accept followers on this twat my tribute to my bestest guy!!
Celineps1 @nealfingtiemann only a few who know n r privy to the real fing/celine thang but I have
Celineps1 @nealfingtiemann a real life twat for my friends who follow my global treks of fortunate musicians and
Celineps1 @nealfingtiemann scribes who oblige my fancy to sit as siren/muse? U choose. Neal knows the real celinetwat name
Celineps1 @nealfingtiemann So let’s all raise a glass(or a toke) to all the young dead (doped up)brilliant rockrs(or wannabs)
Celineps1 @nealfingtiemann or not cause we’ll burn (out)the house down
Celineps1 @nealfingtiemann fuckin pity party!
Celineps1 @nealfingtiemann Block u say? Lmfao! Poor wittle NFT needs his little old ladies tellin his dumbass how to use twatter
Celineps1 @nealfingtiemann If he wanted to block me he would u jealous trolls. He wants my twat, who doesn’t, but he’s gotta beg mercy
Celineps1 @nealfingtiemann stand up fans ha! Kristin n some othr bitch tweet u to block me n then delete it. TWATS! They hate that I had u n they cant
Celineps1 @nealfingtiemann they don’t understand how u can b into me. We both dig excruciating
Celineps1 @nealfingtiemann pain…sweetheart. And u know I have to say it out loud cause u won’t but u can never gag me. Well yeah u can
Celineps1 @nealfingtiemann ok so give me the answer privately n I’m done in public here like I said bfore. Question: Birthday?N shut those pathetic
Celineps1 @nealfingtiemann looser hags the fuck up for good pleeeze darlin!
Celineps1 @nealfingtiemann go check out @Mysticpurz baby set her straight about our sweet painful wounded hearts. Noone gets us. Why?
Celineps1 @nealfingtiemann haha yep I’m hearin voices…of twats twittin their little lonely hearts off about us all over the twitterverse sad hags
Celineps1 @nealfingtiemann shouldnt they b studyin lawlerin n psychiatristin at the univ of the bahamas ;D Wait to hear from u(of cours in my head ha)
Celineps1 @nickgibsonmusic @nealfingtiemann I KNOW RIGHT!? Aww the bus…oh you’re talkin about…
Celineps1 @nealfingtiemann Ha I was wonderin when she would cum on here kissin ure ass an tryin to get ure attention. Predictable much?
Celineps1 @nealfingtiemann Follow your heart and you can never go wrong. Tru. Night lover.
Celineps1 @nealfingtiemann and Thanks I apologize for being too Celine today.
Celineps1 @nealfingtiemann how do u deal w/sleep n timezones? Oh u dont. Sleep. So I won’t accept follower request so…
Celineps1 @nealfingtiemann they ask in it”r u real,what did he do to u,tell me about him?” The answer bein
Celineps1 @nealfingtiemann what didn’t he do but I’ll keep my promise u gave me my fix n I got to…
Celineps1 @nealfingtiemann screw with ure weird fanladies. Someone said a hardcore wanna b like NFT needs a crazy bitch super groupie for his rep…
Celineps1 @nealfingtiemann n cred.Done ha! But we luv.”on those cold n lonely nights” cheers james.
Celineps1 @nealfingtiemann fuck this phone why won’t it download twitdroid?! Textn sux! Sorry this wasn’t ure fault babe ha.operator error.haveani …
Celineps1 @nealfingtiemann haveahelluvaniceday.
Celineps1 @nealfingtiemann well fuck I missed soo much today! Cum back here to a NFT asskissfest!
Celineps1 @nealfingtiemann well accordin to the 100′s of follow request I’m denyin lots of real peeps want
Celineps1 @nealfingtiemann to know the real truth n arnt the blind neal/DC zombies!
Celineps1 @nealfingtiemann n some chicks don’t take kindly to bein used n tossed aside like last nights trojans!
Celineps1 @nealfingtiemann seein as how ure the public figure big rockstar maybe I need a lawyer?
Celineps1 @nealfingtiemann n don’t say ure freak fans got ure back they r all over the internet goin on about your CROTCH N THIGHS
Celineps1 @nealfingtiemann so how legit r those ladies,looks like jealosuy causin them to slander my name at ure request!
Celineps1 @nealfingtiemann u know this is between the two of us n it didn’t have to come to this public display!
Yeah. I know. It’s nearly impossible to actually read through, isn’t it? Why do batshit crazy Idol fans so often have the grammar skills of 5th graders? Naturally, Celineps1 didn’t stop at just harassing Tiemann through his Twitter (and people wonder why this poor guy, whom I once met, likes to kick back with the booze after shows. I would probably huff airplane glue everyday if I had to deal with these whack jobs on a regular basis), she then moved onto Andy Skib.
Celineps1 @andyskib @nealfingtiemann U know what ails Neal is u’re fault right? I’m not responsible for
Celineps1 @andyskib @nealfingtiemann the karmic consequences of the universe that u put into motion
Celineps1 @andyskib @nealfingtiemann bcause of that one selfish little gesture to diss me for lovin him
Celineps1 @andyskib @nealfingtiemann it’s on your head mr. Skib
Celineps1 @andyskib right about now ure sayn w/a mouthful a bbq…
Celineps1 @andyskib will I eva see the last a that crazy fuckn CUNT? Umm, NO!!!
Before then moving onto Cook…but wait, did she threaten him/them? Karmic forces of the universe?? It’s on your head?
Celineps1 @thedavidcook @nealfingtiemann soulmate simpatico?
Celineps1 @thedavidcook @nealfingtiemann It was a whim. U meant nothin to me,not my type. He means everything to me
I have no idea if Celine ever touched any of these guys, nor do I care. She’s still fraking psychotic. This is bunny-boiling, Lifetime-movie shit. I think she used to tard over Daughtry, too, no? Oh, and check out what a Google search brings up — love the new Twitter integration when I’m trying to prove evidence of the batshit crazy!
So she wants to go to Paris with Tiemann, a la Jim Morrison and Pamela Courson, and uh, kill him? Cause him to drink himself to death? It’s not poetic when it’s trite, psychotic and completely one-sided. I have no idea anymore. I have no idea who the hell these people are and why they’re allowed to wander the streets and the interweb. You can’t make this shit up, however, I imagine you might be able to adapt it for a ripped-from-the-headlines episode of Law & Order.
People are strange. Batshit crazy Idol fans are stranger.
Celineps1@nealfingtiemann seein as how ure the public figure big rockstar maybe I need a lawyer?4 mins ago
Please make it stop. Please?