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Kris Allen might be the most likeable American Idol winner ever

2009 November 25
tags: , , ,
by TopIdol

Snuggie Photo from Kris Allen's TwitPic

I’m not a tard. But if I was gonna be a tard, I might tard over Kris Allen.

Yo, 19 Entertainment, Jive Records, all of you yahoos. Do you see what you’re sitting on here? This guy won American Idol without even showing the country one-fourth of his personality or humping anything. I don’t even like this damn show, yet I’m now in too deep with this stupid blog that I can’t stop. Don’t you see that I’m the type of bitter, hollier-than-thou asshat who considers myself above your stupid, manipulative tactics and shitty ass 1:30 karaoke numbers mostly of music I hated to begin with? (For chrissake, do I really need to hear someone else sing I Can’t Make You Love Me ever again?)

I will never make a puffy-paint shirt or slave over an inspirational (s)crapbook to give to some guy I saw on TV. I don’t squee and I don’t thud. I don’t have impure thoughts about men younger than me, especially those who are too young to remember Reagan. I don’t even pick up the phone and vote when you flash those (800) numbers on the screen. Let’s face it, although blogging about this shit show has done more for my writing career than interviewing Paul Rudd and James Cameron, or even getting a M.A. in Journalism, I hate it. I hate American Idol.

But had I never watched this nonsense or been told to write this blog by my old employer, I would have never discovered Kris Allen. I know there are a bunch of batshit crazy Glamberts who claim Adam Lambert is the key to opening up the hearts and minds to those “different” (uh…yeah…), claiming he changed their lives and “awakened” them (I guess that’s what happens when you have a hot flash during prime time television?). But what about people like me? Arrogant east coast liberal types who consider themselves above such low-brow mainstream television. Hell, we only like to admit we watch stuff like Mad Men. And Kris Allen, the clean-cut Christian boy from Arkansas with a young blond homecoming queen wife–seriously, do you know how much people like me hate that sort of thing–reminded me that I shouldn’t judge a book by its cover. That maybe this guy was actually really cool! And really talented! And probably more open minded then asshats like me. (I still liked him after finding out he’s a John Mayer fan. This is usually a dealbreaker.)

And the more I see of Kris Allen outside of the Idol bubble, the more I like this guy. He’s hilarious. I don’t even just follow Kris Allen on Twitter because I have to follow Idol people on Twitter because of this blog. This guy is the real deal. He’s more real than most people I know. In fact, he’s an original, even though he wears store-bought plaid shirts and doesn’t seem to wear foundation. Because he’s just being himself. And so few people ever bother being themselves, ya know?

So, seriously, Idol / Jive / 19E people. Have you guys come up with a strategy for this one? Because he might actually be the one male winner you ever have to make it outside of the scary little Idol world. He might actually be able to sell records and tickets to asshats like me. He might eventually be mentioned without the words American Idol in the sentence. Like, he plays how many instruments and has been writing music for how long? And OMG. He is funny. Like naturally funny (not unintentionally funny, like that Danny Gokey guy, for instance). Really, what’s the deal? Can’t you put him on a few more shows (come on, this guy would be sit-down interview gold with Conan, Letterman and Kimmel)? Maybe get him some random guest spots on Comedy Central’s Adult Swim, perhaps, totally good for street cred. Can you get him to sing at one of those improbably “all-ages nightspots” found on any teenage show on the CW? What about booking him for a set at Coachella? Or perhaps Bonnaroo? Maybe get him as the musical guest on SNL and even allow him to be in a couple of skits? For chrissake, put him on that Glee shit. Everyone loves that damn show. It’s like one of the only things idiots will watch when they’re not concocting sick fantasies about being tag-teamed by a werewolf and an emo vampire. See? The appeal of Kris Allen is endless. He could be American Idol and American Apparel. He’s the guy who might actually be adored by not only moms and little girls, but also frat boys and pompous asshats and gays and churchgoers and atheists, maybe even a few obnoxious Brooklyn hipsters. There are just so many things you could do with this kid, you know?

So just do it.

Spread the word. Do it.
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from → American Idol

Newer Comments →
  • dianne

    Well done on this article. Finally a writer who makes sense and writes with thought and insight. So lacking with most articles and reviewers right now. Well no, actually since season 8 began most coverage has been biased crap.

    Just a question now, I read somewhere on one of the websites that i-Tunes(or Amazon?) had Adams album on sale for .99 on the first day of release. This could really make sales look skewed couldn’t it. I’m not really hung up on these numbers but many people do seem to start making unfair comparisons when they see sales numbers.

    • TopIdol

      That is true. It was $3.99 but there was some coupon or something and you could buy it for $0.99.

      • blacklisted

        Yep, I got Adam’s album for .99 cents. Yeah, me! I was going to buy it when I got Allison’s CD but 99 cents was to0 good an offer.

        I ordered Kris’ CD from Deep Discount and those mofos haven’t mailed it to me yet. One day I’ll get it. For now I’ve got an illegally downloaded version which will have to make due.

  • sosad

    It is very sad how Lambert is continually pimped & allowed to get away w/murder & Kris is just there, being the nice guy that he is. What a waste. Maybe he doesn’t like all that hype, I am kind of thinking that he really doesn’t. Who could blame him after all of the Glambert fiascoes. I guess 19E figures that they are going to pump cash-cow Lambert for as long as they can until next season starts, which is gonna be soon.

  • sosad

    Kris is the real deal. I wish his music didn’t put me to sleep though, but it’s probably related to 19E music & inexperience. I think he’s just going to get better w/time..and he’s not a fame whore which is pretty refreshing. He does seem like a genuinely nice guy & he has a good sense of humor, especially about himself.

  • http://deleted Margie

    I am a casual AI viewer and have never voted for a contestant on the show, but I got dragged to an AI concert by a friend…free ticket and drinks yo..so why the hell not. I was just extremeley impressed by Kris and then started following…he is funny as hell…..and gasp…actually about the music.

  • SarahBeth

    I also cannot get over how adorable Kris and his wife are. They looked STUNNING at the AMA’s together. And also the US Weekly party.

  • sahsouha1

    I agree with every single word u said..Kris is an amazing amazing personn..most talented artist that I have seen in years..beautiful voice..a genuine person..& yet the stupid Jive/19 they don’t have a clue on how to use this fortune in their hands in the right way..I seriously don’t believe them..I Live in NY & round every block I see posters to Adam’s Album..& I can’t be happier for him..but where is Kris’s??I tell u nowhere to be found..it kills me..I adore the guy..I love Adam too..but Adam knows how to market himself without the help of RCA/19, while Kris doesn’t..they r killing him before he starts..and i hope to God that it’s not intentional..because I can’t think any other way! It breaks my hart to see his incredible..soulful album to be selling only 80000 copies in the first week..how come..the people who follow him on twitter are double this number already..so how come he is selling tat low..is seriously beyond me???

    • deez

      You think if over 100,000 bother to follow him on Twitter, they could likewise drop ten bucks for an album.

      • LeighKat

        note: Many of his fans are outside of the US- some countries don’t have iTunes (like where I live)- so I ended up getting a gift card and using a friends US address so I could buy the album.

        No Walmart where I live either.

        • TopIdol

          But there is the Tortuga Rum Cake and Big Black Dick emporiums! Why the hell would you need Walmart?

          • LeighKat

            LMAO!!! I will just run over to Mr. Hammity right now and tell him that his Rum Cake factory needs to stock some Kris Allen CDs! lol!!

          • TopIdol

            LeighKat is gonna street team the Tortuga Rum Cake factory!!! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

      • Verbally Dyslexic

        Maybe they think he’s a comedian and not a musician.

  • nekola

    Coming out of lurkdome to say Thank You, TI. I agree with you that 19/Jive should go after the indie market. I think that Kris has massive crossover potential. I am usually a R&B/Hip-Hop type of gal. I haven’t bought a pop album in 7 years before I bought his. Not only that, I bought the iTunes pass and I bought the Wal-mart CD to get the freakin’ bonus track! I NEVER do that!

    • TopIdol

      I don’t think I’ve heard the bonus track. That’s funny you went to Wal-Mart just to get it.

      • nekola

        The Wal-Mart bonus track is the one Kris co-wrote with Chris Daughtry “Send Me All Your Angels.” The song is OK, but I think the iTunes bonus track is better. And yes, I can’t believe I went to Wal-Mart myself since the three stores that are in my area are at the minimum a 30 minute drive and I pretty much never go to Wal-Mart. Oh well, at least I camouflaged my kristardness when I bought a bunch of household items as well! :)

      • deez

        Idol has some sort of tie-in with WalMart don’t they? I just find it odd that there is NO in-store promotion. (ZERO for Adam either) If they are giving Kris an exclusive bonus track, why would they not try to sell it? I bought the CD there, and I had to look for it. Don’t understand the lack of visibility. Come on WalMart, step it up; he’s your hometown boy!

        • erinnthered

          Actually this is good. If they know he’s not gonna have top heavy sales, then why waste the money now? Save it, let him build an audience through radio play and performances, and then use the money to promote a second single. This is a good sign for his relationship with Jive. Either they never planned to promote him at all, or they knew all along it would take time. The recent statement makes me think the latter. If they didn’t care, they wouldn’t bother saying anything at all.

          • isidra

            I agree. That’s the kind of thing that makes me think that Jive is all right with Kris’s numbers so far. They know that you don’t get anything big immediately without spending a lot of money, so they’re letting it grow organically.

            And, really, even with lower sales, since they’ve spent less money on production of the record than other contestants, they’ll see more of a profit.

        • HB

          I noticed this too. I was in WalMart today (note: NEVER EVER go to WalMart the night before TG, it was like a circus!) and I walked by the music area and didn’t see either Kris or Adam. In years past it seemed like they had these big displays so when you walked by you’d notice, but both their CDs were in the regular CD area, kind of hidden. Just found that odd b/c AI stuff is usually heavily promoted at my WM.

          • deez

            After my last comment, I figured…eh, why the heck not…so I went to Wal Mart’s website. Their contact form said you could send feedback to corporate. I typed a short polite note stating that I was a regular customer, and wanted to buy the AI winner’s album; however, I found it difficult to locate, and was surprised to see no in-store promo. I suggested (nicely of course) that AI has a lot of fans who wish to buy albums and visibility of the product would be appreciated. When I clicked “send”, I was prompted to enter a zip code which routed me to my local store.
            WTF is that? I wanted this to go to freakin HQ not the stupid store 10 min from my house.

            That’s what I get for trying, I guess. That’ll teach me to tard.

          • erinnthered

            Won’t matter. In store promo comes from the label. It has nothing to do with the the store in large retail chains like that. Jive didn’t send out the materials, so Wal-mart couldn’t put them up.

            If he were a smaller artist in a retail music store or music store-like department (Border’s, B&N, etc), then there are some cases where materials come in and they don’t get put up. With an Idol? No way. That would come in the box from corporate, and be required. I used to have to deal with this stuff.

          • deez

            Hmmmmm. That sounds even worse.

          • http://www.affinityhealthandbeauty.co.uk Lamberkitten

            You have no creativity or stamina. A wuss-tard. Take a few lessons from Glamberts, they have commitment, vision AND success. Okay, they may have only stubs now instead of proper working fingers due to excessive dialling, voting and commenting online, but who needs fingers anyway when your idol’ success it at stake? Could you not have travelled to HQ to tell them? Any tard worth it’s salt would’ve. Get with it man! I have little sympathy for Failtards! :)

          • deez

            Lol Lamberkitten, I admit I am nowhere near as committed as the typical Glambert.
            And…( walking thru the open door) I’m sure a few of them should be…:)

    • Starr

      OK, confession? I pre-ordered Kris’s CD on Amazon because I collect hard copy CDs too, but since I’m new to the whole Idol thing, I didn’t know the winners had contracts with Wal-Mart where they release a special edition copy with a bonus track. So when I heard they did I was bummed because I already ordered his CD off Amazon. I got so excited on release day when the album came out that I went to Wal-Mart at freakin’ midnight just to get his CD. It felt SO weird. I’ve never done that for any band I’ve tarded on (well, probably because they never released special copies to Wal-Mart).

      Damn you, Kris Allen.

      • carmine2008

        You have better luck than me. I went to the music stores near my workplace during lunch the entire week last week and got scorned (it was not available until today). Yes. I’m a Kristard and I’m proud of it!!!

  • Starr

    Can there be a “From the Ashes” appreciation post? Because that song rocks. It’s like Paramore meets Incubus or something. I’m so psyched they decided to release that song as a bonus track. It’s got a fucking sitar for crying out loud! WIN. And I could already see it in the soundtrack for the next Spiderman movie or something.

  • ljr

    I agree with your whole post – except Kris Allen’s s not more likeable than David Cook. He may be as likeable, but not more likeable. David Cook is the only Idol I’d ever consider tarding over.

    • Starr

      It’s a matter of personal preference I guess. While Cook was on Idol what turned me off of him was he came off as cocky and smug sometimes. He probably didn’t intend to. But I guess I’m the type of person who doesn’t really care for people mooning the camera when they sing, and Kris never really did that. I can relate more to Kris because if I were in his shoes, I’d feel stupid mooning at the camera too.

      • ljr

        yeah it is personal preference. I’ve followed Cook (not stalked, heh) since he won, and he never comes off as smug in interviews or in the 3 concerts I’ve seen. I think he learned how to sing to the camera on TV; at concerts he connects really well with the audience.
        anyway, Kris is likable, I hope he does well.

  • Muzicizme

    I just stumbled in here, and love the neighborhood. Is there a room for rent? I could put a cot in the laundry room. I don’t take up much space. All I need is room for the box that my stores my Skymall butt.

    I would love to see Kris tour with David Cook. If The Script can open for David, then Kris could, too.

  • Nich

    I’m totally tarding over Kris. I should be more ashamed than I am.

  • LeighKat

    TI- I love your writing style! This post was solid gold. Thank you for your insight- you know I am a Kristard- through and through- saying it LOUD and PROUD- hehe! Hell, under “related posts”, my Idol Concert Recap is in the list!

    While I know that Kris has said time and time again that he’s not an actor – I think he would have fun getting involved with some of the things you mentioned. His interviews,his short moment on VH-1 Best Week Ever, his tweets- Kris could really do well in some TV spots. Even his less than 2 minute interview on Ellen made the audience fall in love.

    I notice a diehard Adam fan posted Kris’s less than stellar presentation at the AMAs- may I ask WHO could have made that shitty script come off as funny? Ummm… the man didn’t have much to work with, don’t rag on him because of that.

    I believe that Kris will continue to do well and I think he will gain the respect of his industry peers and music lovers worldwide. I am happy to see that his label issued a statement underlining their confidence in him- let’s just hope they pick up on what you’ve outlined and make the most of this diamond in the rough :-)

    End tarding.

    • Claire

      I didn’t watch the AMAs, but something tells me his teleprompter reading couldn’t possibly be as bad as Anna Nicole Smith’s trainwreck from a few years ago when she introduced Kanye West.

      • TopIdol

        And I doubt HBD is gonna go out that way, either.

    • erinnthered

      I thought Best Week Ever too, but it’s been canceled. I believe they kept the blog running.

      I agree with TI that a spot on Adult Swim, or maybe even G4 or Spike, would do him good. You know, the best thing would be for him to hook up with some of the people who contribute to Funny or Die. Viral videos are hit or miss, but even a decent miss would give him more credibility.

      I’d laugh if he managed to get a spot at Coachella…then sheepishly wander in the direction of his stage as though I found myself there by accident (as long as he isn’t up against something crazy awesome I haven’t seen before). lol. Bonarroo or ACL seem more his crowd. One of these days an Idol needs to try the festival route to gain new fans. Now is as good a time as any.

      • TopIdol

        I have a friend from high school who works for the company that puts on Bonaroo. Pretty high position, too…hmmmm…..

        • erinnthered

          You know, they have a ton of stages, and he wouldn’t even need to be on the big two. I saw Lilly Allen in one of the second tier tents. ;)

          Dammit, I don’t live within driving distance of Tennessee anymore. :(

          The key is whispering it in the ears of someone at Jive or 19M. Festivals are great strategy for him. A cheap and an easy way to gain fans. I just don’t think the people who manage him have ever thought that way before. I’ve run into all kinds of people since I got here. If I’m in a position with the right person, where it won’t damage my career in the process, I’m throwing it out there.

          • TopIdol

            Yeah. Why haven’t they ever stuck any on the festival circuit? I am going to ask my Bonarroo friend to see how it all works.

          • erinnthered

            Honestly, I’d love to know what your friend says. Not just for Kris, but in general. I have a close friend who’s an up and comer who could benefit.

          • Starr

            That’s an awesome idea. Do you think, though, that a festival like Bonaroo would be concerned about their street cred being in danger if they booked an Idol winner? Personally, I think that’s the only thing that keeps some people from listening to his stuff. Unless of course, you sneak Kris’s album into their iPods or whatever and conveniently leave out the fact that he won Idol…which is what I’ve been doing to my boyfriend lately. I slipped him “Alright With Me” on one of the mix CDs I make him and labeled it “Unknown white guy with guitar” (he knows I tard over Kris and I forced him to vote for the guy a couple of times while the show was on LOL) and he loves the song. I wonder when the right time would be to break the news that he’s been listening to an Idol winner’s song all this time…it would break him, I tell you. :D

        • CB Radio

          Ooooh …. I see the wheels in your mind turning re Bonarroo. Perhaps you can call in a “favor”? ;)

          Was just thinking those music festivals are a good way to promote Kris. Large crowds but he doesn’t have the pressure of performing all by himself through the entire concert. Can play 3-4 songs maybe and pick up new fans along the way.

          If Jive is serious about promoting him abroad, Isle of Wight in the UK comes to mind.

          • Starr

            I think he should play a few things at BBC Radio 1. If freakin’ Justin Bieber the devil child can perform there, dammit, Kris should be able to.

          • TopIdol

            The Moppet of Beelzebub played BBC Radio 1?

            THAT IS JUST WRONG!!!!!

  • Lynn

    what does HBD stand for?

    • Lakshmi

      Hot By Default.

      • Starr

        LOL “hot by default?” Ahahahahaha I love this. He definitely is hot by default. The guy doesn’t even do anything and he’s hot. He’s pretty damn photogenic. And it doesn’t help that he has a killer bod, too. I mean, those Henleys are a godsend in terms of accentuating all that hotness.

        I admit, I tard over him 50% because he’s a hottie.

  • Mac

    I’m tarding over this post, Melinda. A++++.

  • blacklisted

    I could have written this piece, that’s how much it hits home.

    I have never watched AI but got sucked into downloading the performances post-finale.

    As a snotty east coast, better than thou, music snob, the idea of buying an album of a ‘reality star’ or worse, attending an AI tour, was unfathomable. And yet, here I am.

    After years of mocking reality tv and everyone associated with it, I find myself interested in someone coming out of that manipulated arena. Funniest part was that HBD was the one thing that the show couldn’t manipulate. Sure, they could ignore him and give him the number two singng spot 10 weeks in a row, yet still, he prevailed.

    The guy’s genuineness comes though. That along with his musicianship is what won over the toughest crowd in the room, ie. those of us who didn’t even want to be at that party.

    IMO Kris is the kind of guy that sneaks up on you and slowly you find yourself interested. I know that happened to me, one week I was poking fun and the next moment I realized he was the real deal. He is a musician, an artist. One that’s young but one that has shown that he can grow. That’s one reason I think he’s got a lot of potential outside of AI. And for that, I’m thankful.

  • Lynn

    Verbally Dyslexic, what country are you from?

    • 8sourcandy

      The smallest one.

      Only kidding :)

      • TopIdol

        This is the first time I’ve seen your new avatar Too damn funny.

        • lauren722

          I know! 8sourcandy, how did you make that?

      • Verbally Dyslexic

        Size doesn’t matter. :)

    • Verbally Dyslexic

      I’m from Malaysia. Don’t go rooting around for background info now. :)

      • Lynn

        So Kris CDs are sold out in Malaysia?!! WOW I’m so happy as I’m from Singapore originally. So hopefully it’ll sell out in Singapore too..

        • Lynn

          Btw, Malaysia is not a small country but Singapore is.

          • themightyrose

            malaysia is small enough to fit in the great lakes…

            anyway, last weekend i went looking for kris’ cd in pj, that’s where i live, but couldn’t find it, was very upset coz i thought it’s not sold in this country; so am totally excited to know now that it’s sold out! i mean, how freakin awesome is that?!

            p/s oh TI, i freakin love you for this article.

  • Verbally Dyslexic

    Also, thought this might lift the spirits of Kristards a bit. My contact from SonyBMG said Kris Allen’s album has sold out in my country. They’re producing more for sale in the next few days.

    • Starr

      Sweet! I got annoyed when I heard that in the Philippines Kris’s CD isn’t even in stock yet, while Adam’s was, even though Kris had a week’s earlier release.

      • carmine2008

        That’s no longer true!!! I just bought mine a few hours ago. Yes, it’s almost 2 weeks late, but the wait is sooooo worth it.

  • spinningfasterandfastertonowhere

    I never thought I would be caught defending an Idol contestant…lol

  • Verbally Dyslexic

    I was beginning to get really tired of all the Adam Lambert saga from the last few days, so I’m going to hug this post and read it bedtime stories now. Kris Allen is such a nice guy that people easily think he’s a pushover. I think he has a huge awareness of who he is as a person and an artiste that he’s not even bothering to respond to critics, unless it challenges his integrity, which I think is the right thing to do.

    I think he needs to be associated with more indie events and places. He has an eclectic taste in music and films, obviously, so Jive/19 should capitalise on that. They should also nudge him towards writing for other people as well, that will help improve his songwriting ability, allow him to experiment with different sounds and styles and build credibility as a singer-songwriter.

    This guy has so much potential as long as the label and management do right by him.

    Also, I think he and his wife are the most adorable couple ever.

  • spinningfasterandfastertonowhere

    I have been following some of the contestants tweets from Idol this year and most of their tweets have been boring or self promotion. Of all the contestants his have brought a smile to this wicked soul.

    My roomie is a Kristard and follows him and I was like meh. But I have grown to like him and his off the wall humor.

  • L

    Being a Kris tard, I couldn’t agree more. I thought he’d be just another contestant when he sang my favorite song brilliantly, but I ended up liking him more each day. Hell, I’m not even American, I’m not even 16, but I want this guy to be released in my country so much. I want to buy his album. And, seriously, there are few artists that make me feel that way about them these days.

  • sweet

    yeah!! you totally got him!! Thanks for your article; it cheers me up today! I never cracked for an idol before and geez I was wondering how come more people was not seeing that.
    He’s such a funny natural guy, no poker face and he’s just breathing joy of living in his cool laid back way.
    I got his album and just love it. He doesn’t have stellar sales so far (although his single had a nice 67% increase from last week) but I believe he’ll get more market in a similar way as his rise on the idol show. Jives s backing him 150% and I can understand why… don’t let this guy go!

  • SarahBeth

    Thanks so much for this, TI. I loved reading this and Kris is hysterical to follow on twitter. He makes me laugh all of the time. :)

    He is likeable and his album is quite good.

    I will also admit that I bought AL’s album. Broken Open is just gorgeous.

  • Fan

    Hearts in my eyes! This blog is made of so much win!
    Four for you, no seriously!

    I couldn’t agree more with what you’re saying, if only Jive would act on it! It boggles my mind when I read things like “he’s boring and lacks any personality”. Are we serious now? I don’t understand how anyone can miss it.

  • http://michaeljohnsonline.com Judes

    Thanks for this take on Kris!! I think many people will be like you, the more you hear him in interviews & the more you hear him perform the more you begin to like him!!
    I was a little quicker on the update & do actually quite like American idol from an entertainment perspective but understand not everyone is the same!!
    The respect & credibility will only increase for Kris , the more he is out there . He does have quite a few things lined up from now to Christmas which will help his exposure but those programmes you mentioned wouldn’t hurt either!!

  • AIFan

    You are a tard. Just own up to it. But you know, there were many before him just as likeable, real, talented, etc., etc. Or at least that’s what their tards claimed. And, I am sure, many of them were. And, I am sure, Kris is. But in the Idol universe, there is nothing unique about him – or you, for that matter.

    Oh, and Kris tards, don’t give up on him yet. Give him some time – the album may pick up sales yet. His music is good and that’s what matters.

    • spinningfasterandfastertonowhere

      “But in the Idol universe, there is nothing unique about him”

      Oh really have you read some of the other former Idol contestants tweets?

      Their tweets are usually self-promotion, boring or nonsense.

    • Starr

      He’s unique in the fact that he’s the only contestant who started out as canon fodder and went on to really make it big in the end and win the Idol crown. That alone is full of win.

  • haha

    “I will never make a puffy-paint shirt or slave over an inspirational (s)crapbook to give to some guy I saw on TV.”

    But you might make a paper-mache bust of David Cook. Oh, yes, you might!

    • TopIdol

      Oh yes. Oh yes I will. The man sang the greatest Lionel Richie Video song ever. Therefore, a paper mache bust is necessary.

      I still think Cook’s Hello and Always Be My Baby were his best performances. But I am so thankful YouTube exists, so I can watch Lionel Richie’s Hello whenever I damn well please.

      • haha

        Hello was amazing. The day we present Cookie with that bust will be one of the best days of my life.

        • haha

          OK, I hadn’t watched that video in forever – I totally forgot that Lionel was the blind girl’s teacher in that video. It’s so hilarious and STALKER!!! That makes Cookie’s creepy interpretation even better.

      • http://www.affinityhealthandbeauty.co.uk Lamberkitten

        The song I can live with but why, why, why remind us of the visual? Cruel!

  • Lynn

    Thank you thank you thank you for seeing the real Kris Allen while the rest of the media is treating him like dirt! This is the BEST article anyone had ever written for Kris Allen thus far!!! So I thank you for that! I’ve never an invested fan for AI but Kris Allen turns me into one because of his talents and personalities.

  • alicat10025

    I am officially in love with this article. And I have my Kris CD from Wal-Mart since I wanted the Chris Daughtry bonus track. But I ordered it in advance of the drop date to be shipped since there’s no Wal-Mart near me

  • auntieaimee

    That’s a badass Snuggie. It looks like he belongs to a sexy cult.

    • Steph

      Wow. I’m dense. I had no idea that was a snuggie. Now it is even FUNNIER.

      Nevermind what I thought it was…

      • Steph

        ETA: Need to learn to read captions.

  • Anne

    One season too late. For all that you said they already have David Cook. He’s their likeable male winner, and the best of it? He’s not even married like Kris Allen.
    That’s one of Kris problems, he came after David and he’s just a low version of David.

    Every season there are people who say they weren’t american idol fans but then they saw X and Y and they’re the real deal and not american idol type… yadda yadda yadda.
    Kris is just a regular dude who sing well but without the IT factor.
    And he’s not a very good songwritter. Red Guitar is one awful bland song. Even Jason Castro has more IT than Kris. If you wanna go for the laid back normal singsongwriter type.

    Anyway, there’s nothing new about Kris that other idols didn’t have already.

    • http://sara.com Sara

      I used to be a Castro tard…still kinda am.

      But Kris is a way better songwriter than him.

      I thought Jason’s pre-idol songs were so good, but if you compare it to Kris’s “Brand New Shoes” it really just puts Jason’s stuff to shame.

      Also, the only thing that you could attribute as IT to Jason is his dreads.

      • Starr

        LOL his dreads? Hahaha

        I also agree about Brand New Shoes. If that’s what all amataeur CDs sound like, then bring ‘em on.

        • http://sara.com Sara

          I mean, that’s the only thing really different about him. LOL.

    • 8sourcandy

      I like to tease Kris-tards, but I don’t think Kris is boring. He may get overshadowed sometimes, but he has a nice personality. You do make a good point about David Cook and Kris being similar. Kris should be able to tap into Cook’s fan base. Maybe they should do some shows together.

      • http://sara.com Sara

        I would actually love a Cook, Kris Allen tour even though I’m not so into Cook, myself. They seem like friends so I could see it happening, but at the same time I wouldn’t want it to be looked at as like…an American Idol tour, you know?

      • TopIdol

        I don’t know if they are similar, per se. In some regards, yes, but I see Allen as more a Ray LaMontagne or Citizen Cope type.

        • Starr

          Dude. Seriously, you’re reading my mind. I just saw Ray LaMontagne in concert last Sunday (in lieu of the AMA debacle, thank God) and I tweeted Kris about how their performance styles are so similar. If Kris could have the same success as Ray LaMontagne, I’d be happy. THAT guys doesn’t give two shits what people think about him, and he sings like a badass motherfucker.

        • erinnthered

          When I played LLWD for some friends of mine, one actually said Kris sounded like a poppier (sp?) Citizen Cope. Totally agree. He’s also much more of a Ray LaMontagne type than Taylor ever was, and lots of Taylor fans thought he would be Ray 2.0.

          I’ve been around since season one as a viewer – this show is crack – but there is something a little different about Kris. Cook definitely has the personality, but Kris is a better songwriter and musician, IMHO. It’s a more complete package.

          I never liked or understood the Castro appeal. Maybe I’ve just known too many guys with guitars who are exactly like him.

          • Starr

            Castro is all right, but lacks the intensity that Kris has when he sings. Exhibit A: “Is It Over”, when he sings on that second verse and he goes “But I won’t let you go as you walk out on me”, he sung that verse like a boss and I swear to God I saw flashes of Donny Hathaway and Sam Cooke when he sung that line.

          • nekola

            I love, love, love Is It Over. You can really hear his soulful voice on that song. I like the majority of the songs on his album, which rarely happens for me. I think the problem with the album may be the production. I think Jive/19E pushed it too much for the pop sound that Kris’ voice and emotion may have gotten lost in it. I think that he sounds great and I can hear his intensity. However, I can see how the songs can be bland to some. I think the instruments in Is It Over overpowers Kris’ voice. Also, Can’t Stay Away and Written All Over My Face sounds so much better live than on the album. All I am really hoping for is that Kris sell enough albums so that he can make another one. So hopefully the upcoming promotional and album tours will help with sales.

          • Starr

            I disagree with the instruments overpowering his voice in “Is It Over”. I think the pitter-pattering build up of them is nice and makes the song sound more intense. I think the song that could probably use less production is “Heartless”. I also think you can hear the guitar chord shift creaks too loudly on “Written All Over My Face. You can hear them loudly when you have earphones on, but through speakers it is fine. “Can’t Stay Away” needed more guitar and drums to add to the energy of the song. Agreed, WAOMF and CSA sound better live.

          • TopIdol

            Just because HIcks did “Trouble”? Oh Hells no. They are nothing alike. Maybe in some strange “awkward” way, perhaps, but I was more talking about guitar-driven acoustic goodness.

            I liked Castro during the season, but his fans and family, and his personality, really turned me off in the months after. He really wasn’t anything special.

          • erinnthered

            I think it was more based on Hick’s pre-Idol album. It had much more of a Bluesy/ Americana vibe. People were expecting him to come from there musically, but he had other, crappier ideas.

            The thing about Castro is, he’s a boy with dreads, from Dallas, who plays guitar and uke. I lived in Austin for 5 years. There were plenty of boys with dreads, from Dallas or Houston or anywhere, that played guitar and uke. At least most of them could cover Dylan and Marley without making my ears bleed.

    • deez

      Cook is likeable and talented, but that doesn’t mean HBD is a “version” of him. (Kris is better looking for one thing :) …yeah, I said it) I beg to differ on the “it” factor. I find him quite engaging (I like Red Guitar…it’s kind of U2ish). So…different strokes, I guess.

      Plus…Kris being married is a plus for him. He may be able to steer clear of HollySockpuppets and others of her ilk.

      • Starr

        Totally got the same vibe from “Red Guitar”. It’s reminiscent of “Where the Streets Have No Name” or “Sometimes You Can’t Make It On Your Own”.

      • Tard?

        I totally agree that both Cook and Kris are talented, funny, snarky and likeable. Both can write music and lyrics adequately, both can play the guitar fairly well, and both are practically twitter geniuses, compared to the average celebrity. The guy that you prefer probably has more to do with which genre of music you prefer, than anything else. When it comes to the most important comparison, their looks (heh), I think that both guys are very attractive. For me Kris clearly won the hair and normal sized cranium lottery (Cook’s hair situation is almost tragic) and Cook won the face lottery, by far (Kris has a bit of a monkey thing going on). Yep, I’m shallow.

    • L

      Red Guitar is my favorite song on the album, as for now. So underrated, this one.

      • TopIdol

        Where are you from, L? (I suppose I could check your IP, but that’s lazy and I want to know from YOU. Ha.)

        • L

          Brazil. The land in which no one watches Idol, expect me and a couple of friends. Sad.

    • auntieaimee

      Come on, now. Jason Castro is a big goob.

    • lauren722

      I disagree with you completely. I love the song “Red Guitar” and I think Kris is a great song writer. To me, that is where his talent lies, he doesn’t just have vocals like past winners. He can also write music and play many different instruments. Whether you see it or not, he does have that “it” factor.

      • lauren722

        This was to Anne btw. I just read through all the other replies and everyone has already said everything in my comment lol.

  • Starr

    Dude, truer words were never spoken. *slow clap*

  • 12cubed

    Thank you for this. I agree with all of it.

    Unfortunately, I don’t think 19E agrees.

    Yeah, I’m a Kris-tard. And yeah, today has been a really depressing day to be a fan.

  • Hope F. LeSane

    TopIdol…you’re take on Kris Allen was spot on. He’s funny as hell, talented as hell, good looking as hell and down to earth as hell.

    E19 could have a cash cow on their hands, if only they’d invest more time and money in promotion.

    I’m thinking that RCA and the glitter people have a cease and demand order over there.

  • josh

    This is the best shit I ever read in my life. Kris is the bomb. Give him time, he’s going places.

  • Heather

    Wow, I could have written this article, word for word. I’ve been saying for a while now that Kris Allen could appeal to the indie crowd if only the indie crowd would get over their prejudice against Idol (like I had to do). Thank you. This is the best article about Kris I’ve ever read.

  • Steph

    I love his album. I really do. I also really like Kris. He makes me laugh, he’s so unedited and just humorous and just strikes me as a guy that it would be so easy to hang around with. I love the persona he gives off. IT’s the most welcoming thing I’ve seen from any idol.

    His album makes me think of all calm, good things I like in my life. I associate it with happy moments. It just makes me feel good.

    If no one else gets it, great, I kinda like the guy more because he doesn’t have the crazy stans. :)

  • deez

    http://newsroom.mtv.com/2009/11/25/kris-allen-interview-outtakes/

    I posted this in the older topic earlier today, but I’ll put it here as well.

    • TopIdol

      Don’t you click the links in my posts, Deez? :)

      The KRIM Show is what motivated me to write such a heartfelt missive in the first place.

      • deez

        My Bad.

      • SarahBeth

        The Krim show needs to happen. Immediately.

        You have Jim’s inside ear. Make it happen.

        • L

          My thoughts exactly.

        • TopIdol

          I must admit, I was a bit excited when they mentioned “Jim’s Karaoke Birthday Party”.

          • 8sourcandy

            You are such a fame-whore :)

  • Aerina

    *Standing ovation*
    NGL during Idol I rolled my eyes as Paula said he might be the most likable contestant they ever had.
    But I am totally converted now…. yes, I maybe one of his tard now. I care too much about this boy. Damn he can conquer haters like you , VFTW, even Idol hater gave him the note 10 for his Heartless.
    He is genuine, I was surprised that before the final he said that he hoped he ain’t getting the christian votes, he just hoped it was all about the music. All the time he is not trying to hide something only to get more votes or to sell more albums.

  • 8sourcandy

    Because YOU BROUGHT UP your new favorite song, “Whataya Want From Me,” here it is. A lovely little redemption performance I like to call genius.

    • yuppie

      It really is impossible to write an article or blogpost about Kris without Glamberts feeling the need to invade, isn’t it?

      • 8sourcandy

        Top Idol brought it up.

      • TopIdol

        All but one of the frequent Glambert visitors I like. I feel as if there must be something good inside of them if they even come over to play in the first place :)

        • 8sourcandy

          I know you like me, you said so. :)

        • http://www.affinityhealthandbeauty.co.uk Lamberkitten

          I won’t be counting myself as one of the favoured glamberts – but I do come over to play and I like it here. And I did defend Kris on AO the other week. I daren’t give too many details for fear of fanning more glamtard hatred, but the article was immature, inflammatory and as far as I could see no actual proof of the allegation – and I said so – and took some shit for it – but some others agreed too – so all good. Brownie points? :)

          • TopIdol

            Don’t worry, Lamberkitten, you weren’t the one I was talking about. :)

          • http://www.affinityhealthandbeauty.co.uk Lamberkitten

            Yeay! :)

      • 12cubed

        Pretty much.

      • 8sourcandy

        You’re right. I should hog the blogs. Sorry.

      • WhoEver

        It really is impossible to write an article or blogpost about Kris without Glamberts feeling the need to invade, isn’t it?

        It really is. The funniest part is, I think this was the Glambert who claimed she was relatively sane, and made a list of “rules” for other Glamberts so they wouldn’t be acting BSC and unreasonable. Heh.

        • lauren722

          Hmmm maybe the reason we “invade” is because we actually like Kris too? Or is that not an option. I was not aware that Adam fans were banned from this post.
          And btw: The Glambert you are referring to is no more insane than all the Kristards here are. I don’t consider anyone her to be insane.

          • http://www.affinityhealthandbeauty.co.uk Lamberkitten

            Thanks Lauren :) . And you are quite right, although when I first started posting here I was neutral about Kris as I probably wouldnt have gone looking for stuff about him off my own back, even on AO they put Kris stuff in a different section called “Kradam” – am sure you would love it! And as I stick to the main board there for info and tarding purposes I don’t get to see much about Kris. But seeing the interviews, music clips and reading the tardery here has certainly given me a warmer appreciation. But anyhow, I notice TI done nother post bout the Letterman show, yeay! back to Adam! :)

          • 12cubed

            Hmmm maybe the reason we “invade” is because we actually like Kris too? Or is that not an option.

            I’m not really getting “liking Kris” from 8sourcandy’s posts here (which is what yuppie was originally referring to). Of course, she’s free to dislike him and make posts about Adam in a Kris-centric article, but I don’t think your comment applies to her in this case.

        • http://www.affinityhealthandbeauty.co.uk Lamberkitten

          Me? Ok, well I don’t recall writing a set of rules for glamberts tho I suppose when your completely BSC you prolly tend forget half of it. But I do recall responding to a thread on AO where a poster wanted fans to go storming over to some site after a mildly negative article. I did advise caution in this regard and think managed, on that one occasion, to stop the onslaught. And you would probly be surprised too by the amount of “crazy” glamberts who agreed with me.

          Sorry you are upset Adam fans are commenting within a Kristard fest. Don’t really know else to say to cheer you up! Ooooh, I know, Adam’s album slipped a space yesterday on itunes. There, all good now I hope? :)

          • 12cubed

            No, not you. I specifically referred to 8sourcandy in my post, don’t know why you’d think I was referring to you.

            Sorry you are upset Adam fans are commenting within a Kristard fest.

            Huh? I’m not upset that Adam fans are commenting. I was just pointing out to Lauren that some of the comments from Adam fans are clearly not because they like Kris (as she suggested), which is why her reply to WhoEver doesn’t make sense. I think you’re using a straw-man argument.

          • lauren722

            I don’t think 8sourcandy has ever said anything mean about Kris. I don’t feel like reading all the posts to confirm though. Anyway, people who despise Adam always comment on posts related to him just to bash him. And unless it goes too far we don’t complain so either way, this is a really stupid argument.

          • http://www.affinityhealthandbeauty.co.uk Lamberkitten

            Now am totally confused and have gone all blurrey-eyed trying to work out who posted what and said what to whom. Think I need sleep!

    • http://www.affinityhealthandbeauty.co.uk Lamberkitten

      Oooh, whilst we are on the subject, dya see that on Letterman – think it has the edge – not that much between the vocals for either show but liked the little smile at “Hey I’m a freak, but thanks for lovin me” – and, erm, perhaps wisest not to mention here but in for a penny in for a pound – the pants were good too :)

      • TopIdol

        My Tivo cut it off right as he finished the song.

        He really needs to cut down on the makeup. As someone who dyes their hair darker, I get it. But I really think he could chill on the foundation and look a lot better. It ages him. And no, this isn’t me saying he needs to be “less gay” (yawn) or “less himself”. It just isn’t doing much to highlight his strengths and conceal his flaws.

        • lauren722

          I agree! There is nothing wrong with freckles! I love all his eye makeup but he really doesn’t need the pounds of cover-up.

        • http://www.affinityhealthandbeauty.co.uk Lamberkitten

          I don’t know what happened to Adam’s face since the auditions! I still think he is handsome but seems more pudgy in the face yet not in the body so much? Wonder what gives?

        • 8sourcandy

          I really only noticed the pants.

          • http://www.affinityhealthandbeauty.co.uk Lamberkitten

            :)

  • Marcus

    So.. Is that why his album sales suck?

  • deez

    http://music-mix.ew.com/2009/11/25/kris-allen-first-week-sales/

    Read the comments below Slezak’s article. Sadly, too many people still feel this way. He needs to be a speaking guest on Conan, Leno, etc…rather than just performing…to showcase his personality.(The latest out-takes from Jim C are hilarious.)
    There are still way too many people who think he’s boring. (huh? Since when is funny and smart boring? I guess he should do something “important” and “though-provoking” like shove his crotch in someone’s face)

    And……What is the deal with Wal-Mart? Here you have the nation’s (maybe the world’s ??) largest retailer, based in his home state and they can’t even put up posters for Christmas shoppers? The electronics dept. needs this boy’s face all over the area. If everybody in Little Rock who voted bought a copy of the album, he’d be sitting pretty. I wonder how many of them even know he’s released an album? You wouldn’t know it by shopping in Wal Mart. FAIL.

    • TopIdol

      He’s clearly too liberal for Wal-Mart? He likes gay people and has a sense of humor. This may be akin to Quija boards and the morning after pill.

      • deez

        Lol. Don’t they insist that “Cosmopolitan” be displayed in shrink wrap? ( To shield people’s virgin eyes from articles like ” Top Ten Ways to Please Your Man Over the Holidays”)

        • erinnthered

          Really?! I never really shop in Wal-mart unless I have to, so…really?!

          • deez

            I think so (pretty sure). Lol. I think I’ll check the next time I’m there. You see, I’m lazy and there’s a Wal Mart 10 minutes from my house, Target is 20 minutes. So my convictions are not strong enough to over-ride that extra 20 min of round trip driving.

          • TopIdol

            Target is heaven on earth.

      • lauren722

        It surprises me that Walmart is even selling either of their CDs. Didn’t they not sell Green Day’s because of a few cuss words? I buy my CDs at Target. Much higher class.

  • damitman

    OMG!! This is the most awesomest thing Ive ever read!! I hope you send this to AI/JIVE/19E cuz they should read this shit and get a clue!

  • 8sourcandy

    TOP IDOL
    “I’m not a tard.” Um, yes you are. You should just own it. You know why? Because “…so few people ever bother being themselves…”

    Before sending him off into the vapid vortex of cable TV watch this clip. It may have you rethink things.

    • TopIdol

      The AMAs were pathetic. But then again, no one from Season 8 of AI came off looking good on stage, did they? It’s a shame HBD didn’t do anything “in the moment”.

      • 8sourcandy

        Hey, I don’t have a problem saying Adam’s performance sucked. Nor does he.

  • http://watercoolerconvo.blogspot.com h2oconvo

    Thought I’d come in here and say that I’ve been totally agreeing with a lot of what you’ve been writing lately, but especially to this one. It bugs the crap out of me when I see people use the default “he’s boring and has no personality” comments to put him down when he’s shown so many times that that couldn’t be further from the truth. But too many people have their glitter-goggles on to even give him half a chance. I mean, come on! That snuggie picture had me crying and howling with laughter.

    • TopIdol

      Most of his entire Twitpic account is comic gold. I especially love this recent gem:

      http://twitpic.com/quqbe

      But this may still be my all-time favorite:

      http://twitpic.com/lotw3

      • Verbally Dyslexic

        Skymall should pay him for the amount of exposure he’s given that mag.

        • Starr

          I know, right? Skymall has a Twitter……

      • erinnthered

        The Coke Santa was amazing. I think that’s what sealed the deal for me. Seriously, 19, put this guy out there!

    • erinnthered

      I don’t just agree so much with TI’s post, I also agree so, so, so much with this comment!

  • Nicole

    Well, since you love him so much, I hope you’re buying his CDs since no one else seems to be.

    • yuppie

      I must have missed the day in school where 80,000 = no one.

      • sup

        Maybe she got confused with the 8 so to her it looks like a zero? Let me go check my KA CD because I’m pretty sure I bought one…

    • TopIdol

      I bought it off iTunes. I don’t download multiple copies or gift people with such things.

      I also downloaded Whataya Want From Me. If I like something, I will listen to it. I have no problem admitting that. :)

      • 8sourcandy

        Had I read this first I would not have been such a bitch on the “tard” thing. :)

        • Claire

          Didn’t TI admit she liked WWFM in another post? I could’ve sworn I read several posts about how she liked his music. Just because you think HBD has a sense of humor doesn’t mean you automatically think all of Adam’s music is crap.

          • TopIdol

            This is true.

            And both Can’t Stay Away and Whataya Want For Me are in heavy rotation on my iPod at the moment. I have never once said I hated Adam Lambert. In fact, I usually say I really want to like him more.

      • erinnthered

        I was totally going to buy a couple of singles on iTunes until the OUT magazine thing. It hit too close to home.

        I just can’t bare to give that guy money. No matter how catchy Whataya Want From Me or Sleepwalker is.

        • Starr

          Feel the same way, erin. If I bought one of his songs, it would feel like me giving Perez Hilton hits on his website.

    • AH

      *pinches self* Yep, I exist!

      I’m listening to his CD as we speak actually

    • auntieaimee

      I bought my copy. Yay, me.

    • cc

      As far as I know, one week sales doesn’t make or break one artist or singer…oh well…

      You know what I like about him is his self-awareness…. He is a smart guy and knows that he is NOT the next big thing. He just wants to do music and sells it to whom appreciate it. As a fan, I guess I will enjoy the ride.

      (Yes, TI, love this post. )

  • AH

    I’m coming out of lurkdom to say…I love you, Top Idol!

    I could not agree more. Kris Allen is the real deal and so much more

  • Carlisle

    Aw, my heart. It swells with love. Just in time for Thanksgiving!

  • mustang

    I so totally agree with this, it’s not funny. Brava!

  • yuppie

    Homophobe.

    Also, I think this post might make me start tarding over you! ;)

    • Verbally Dyslexic

      I already committed myself to one of TI’s post, so yeah, yuppie, don’t hold back.

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